Old Timey Drama Hour Submission Thread

[Chris]

As previously promised, here's the thread for those who want to take a tour down memory lane with old timey radio guy. Drop your submissions here, but be reasonable and keep them limited to a single paragraph. And for the record, "reasonable" means a couple of sentences, not a wall of text.

[The Fowl Sorcerous]

Join Mr Mark Twain (aka Samuel Clemens) and Mr Nikola Tesla (aka The Master Lightning) in a white-knuckle thriller as they save the very world. Not recommended for the soft of the sissy, the weak at heart or the dull of mind. The Five Fists of Science!
Twain! Tesla!
America: You cannot spell 'Action & Adventure' without T&T!!!

[Arbiter GUNDAM]

whoops, this one was done already.

[YokozunaBulldozer]

Introducing the LBX! The Little Battler eXperience full of wonderful timeless fun!
Just snap the core skeleton together, dress it up with your favorite armor frame, sync your ccm and you are ready to rumble! Battle your friends! Battle your rivals! Maybe even save the world!
With customization options endless and skills that pay the bills this is one experience you wont want to miss out!
LBX! Its the little battle experience that could!

Available at all hobby stores and toy stores near you in the somewhat distant future!

[project 5]

A massive deep-space mining ship goes dark after unearthing a strange artifact on a distant planet. Engineer lsaac Clarke embarks on the repair mission, only to uncover a nightmarish bloodbath_the ship's crew horribly slaughtered and infected by an alien scourge. Now lsaac is cut off, trapped, and engaged in a desperate fight for survival.

[eanetdude]

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away . . . .

STAR WARS !!!

It is a period of civil war. Rebel spaceships, striking from a hidden base, have won their first victory against the evil Galactic Empire.

During the battle, Rebel spies managed to steal secret plans to the Empire's ultimate weapon, the DEATH STAR, an armored space station with enough power to destroy an entire planet.

Pursued by the Empire's sinister agents, Princess Leia races home aboard her starship, custodian of the stolen plans that can save her people and restore freedom to the galaxy....

[PHILLYgundamnFAN]

Please bring this to life in the way only an old time radio man can

And who are you, the proud lord said,
that I must bow so low?
Only a cat of a different coat,
that's all the truth I know.
In a coat of gold or a coat of red,
a lion still has claws,
And mine are long and sharp, my lord,
as long and sharp as yours.
And so he spoke, and so he spoke,
that lord of Castamere,
But now the rains weep o'er his hall,
with no one there to hear.
Yes now the rains weep o'er his hall,
and not a soul to hear.

[YokozunaBulldozer]

It's the distant future.
There is a new form of sports entertainment where Bobblehead robots engage in fierce athletic competition.
This is Iron League, where metal clashes with metal and hotblooded sportsmanship overload circuits.
Meet Silver Castle, the lowest ranking losers this side of Odaiba.
When all seems grim and dark for these pathetic failures, a light of hope shines as top ranking soccer player Mach Windy leaves the number 1 team Dark Prince and joins the roster along with the nomad enigmatic pitcher Magnum Ace.
Can they survive this corrupt and violent league through fair play and hot-bloodedness?
This is sportsmanship!
This is robot action!
This is Iron League!

[jabman025]

Oh, you think darkness is your ally. But you merely adopted the dark; I was born in it, molded by it. I didn't see the light until I was already a man, by then it was nothing to me but BLINDING!

[PHILLYgundamnFAN]

Uwe Boll's fantasy adventure film In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale stars Jason Statham as Farmer, a simple man from the Kingdom of Ehb whose goal as the story begins is to care for his family. However, when the power-hungry Gallian (Ray Liotta) invades the kingdom, Farmer must abandon his simple existence in order to rescue his wife (Claire Forlani) and save his king (Burt Reynolds). This film is a cinematic adaptation of the video game Dungeon Siege.

[Saber]

I'm reasonably sure this is too long for Chris, but I feel this would be brillaint in the Old Timey Drama voice, so I humbly beg your forgiveness for posting this.

"It's MEGA MAN versus the powerful leaders and fighting forces of Monsteropolis - that strange multi-layered land of robot-like humanoids created by the wrongly-performed experiments with human beings by Dr. Wily.

Mega Man - the chosen defender of the human race. For he dares to single-handedly penetrate Monsteropolis' seven separate societies to stop the rapid expansion of strange misrepresentations of humans.

Mega Man's goal is monumental. He must infiltrate seven separate heavily-guarded empires. By himself, he must break down and destroy the following empire leaders: Cutman, Gutsman, Iceman, Bombman, Fireman, Elecman, and Dr. Wily.

The action involves Mega Man armed only with laser beam weapons, encountering strangely-configured humanoids. They're atop, in and out of fortified prison-like structures strengthened with thick walls. Hidden amid gun turrets embedded in concrete uprights, even in subterranean passages below icefields. Will you and Mega Man penetrate the seven separate societies of Dr. Wily and preserve the human race? You're in control!"

[angelwingzero]

On location from the frontlines aboard the SDF-1 Macross. Brave Valkyrie pilots await the next scramble order to fend off the Zentradi scourge. They're equipped with pilot suits in case of a hull breach, photos to remind them of their sweethearts during battle, and USDA choice steak for dinner. Can't beat those Zentrans on an empty stomach!

As the Macross continues on it's journey home they wait and wonder where and when the next attack will take place. In the rings of Saturn? During a Minmay concert? In a park after a trip to the arcade? The wait continues until, klaxons! The scramble order is given and our boys are off to fight the good fight again. Good luck fellas, teach those greenskins the meaning of culture. We'll have delicious pineapple salad waiting when you return.

[Robolizard222]

I'm a little teapot
Short and stout
Here is my handle
Here is my spout
When I get all steamed up
I just shout
Tip me over and pour me out

I'm a very special pot
It's true
Here's an example of what I can do
I can turn my handle into a spout
Tip me over and pour me out

[Proteus]

I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you.

[AJQ32]

When man and Machine become one...

Matt Lowell is in hell--and there's no place he'd rather be. At a training camp on the backwater planet Earth, he and his fellow cadets are learning to ride Mechas: biomechanicals sporting both incredible grace and devastating firepower. Their ultimate aim is to combat the pirates of the Corsair Confederacy, who are constantly raiding Universal Union Territories.

But before they survive a battle, they have to survive their training. And as much as the robotic avatars are their greatest weapon, they may also be their greatest weakness. For every time Lowell and his comrades "plug in" to their Mechas, their minds are slowly being twisted and broken by an unseen power that is neither man...nor machine.

The Few. The Proud. The Machines.

Mecha Corps

(Novel by Brett Patton)

[zero_the_masked_knight]

For the benefit of Mr. Kite there will be a show tonight on trampoline
The Hendersons will all be there late of Pablo Fanques' fair, what a scene
Over men and horses hoops and garters lastly through a hogshead of real fire
In this way Mr. K will challenge the world

The band begins at ten to six when Mr. K performs his tricks without a sound
And Mr. H will demonstrate ten somersets he'll undertake on solid ground
Having been some days in preparation a splendid time is guaranteed for all
And tonight Mr. Kite is topping the bill

[phillosmaster]

Heroic earthling Flash Gordon saves the world from the nefarious Ming the Merciless in this lavish, intentionally campy adaptation of the famous sci-fi comic strip. Ming has developed a plan to destroy the Earth, and Flash and his attractive companion, Dale Arden, are called upon to stop him. Along the way, Flash must battle Ming's goons and the temptations of a luscious space princess. Flash - a-ah - saviour of the universe.

[Arbiter GUNDAM]

The world... is on the brink of going boom-boom.
If we don't make a stand here and now...
we gonna die.
Now ROLL FOR INITIATIVE!!!

[Mu La Flaga]

Tune in every week to join the Transformers.
As Optimus Prime and his heroic Autobots battle to stop Megatron and those dastardly Decepticons.
They are more then meets the eye!
You could say they are robots in disguise.

[The Fowl Sorcerous]

Space, the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Enterprise. Its five-year mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go where no man has gone before.