Pariahs: Phase 1 Part 2

Your own tale of two mecha.

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NewLondenion
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Pariahs: Phase 1 Part 2

Post by NewLondenion » Mon Apr 23, 2007 4:16 pm

The Second Part of my prologue metachapter, Phase 1, is up for my fanfic Gundam Seed Pariahs.

Because of the immense length I'm posting it on my Deviantart site.

Here's my DA url:

http://newlondenion.deviantart.com

And here's the link to Part 2

http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/53848840/

There are information posts on my DA site as well including characters, events, and weapons.

It's a work in progress but since the summer's coming up I may be able to update more often.

Also, please comment on my work, if not there then on here.

Hope you enjoy!
"Just another day in the office."
-Cathas Okeze, ADVENT Fanfic Project

Anonymous

Post by Anonymous » Thu Apr 26, 2007 5:00 am

It's pretty good, there are some faults with it, but they are handleable. The main character DOES seem in danger of becoming a Marty Stu, a bit, but so long as you have him loose every once in a while and show uncertainty and so-forth, you know to make him seem more human, it should be fine.

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