A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

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Dean_the_Young
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

By far your best episode in awhile, my friend. I have to say that the Marina piece was, by far, the best. It's like every single stereotype of nice-princess-mother figure rolled up into one, and it put Lacus to shame. SHAME!

The fact that Ali played along just made it all the more epic.
I'm sorry this letter is so long, but I did not have time to make it shorter. -Mark Twain

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Thundermuffin
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

Dean_the_Young wrote:By far your best episode in awhile, my friend. I have to say that the Marina piece was, by far, the best. It's like every single stereotype of nice-princess-mother figure rolled up into one, and it put Lacus to shame. SHAME!

The fact that Ali played along just made it all the more epic.
Thanks, I decided Marina should be the opposite end of the spectrum from my portrayal of Lacus. She's a total ninny.
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

SHINN: (Excitedly) Mr. Al Saachez! Mr. Al Saachez! Could you please kill someone for the camera??

ALI: (Amused, but shakes his head) Sorry, kid. That’s bad business. I don’t kill anyone for free.
This part had me on the floor. Ali's lines were golden here.
REGENE: (Grins) Any last words, Buuuuur-ing?
(Bring just grits his teeth and the Garazzo’s escape pod breaks off from its main body, flying straight up.)
REGENE: (Shakes head) Right then. Forgot we don’t talk on Planet You.
zmmptet3
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

I love how Neil keeps giving Ali the finger.

No pistol. Just a finger.

Love it.
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Thundermuffin
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

(The trailer begins and the screen starts off black. We hear a voice.)

LYLE’S VOICE: (Voice-over) They say in space…no one can hear you scream.

IAN’S VOICE: (Voice-over) Well, of course not! It’s space; there’s no sound.

LYLE’S VOICE: Yeah, I know, but I was being dramatic, old man.

IAN’S VOICE: Dramatic my ass! You wouldn’t know drama if it sniped you in the head!

LYLE’S VOICE: I’ll snipe YOU in the head! Just like my codename says!

IAN’S VOICE: Your codename implies you shoot at the sky! Y’know, instead of enemies that might be in front or behind you? What kinda sense does that make?

LYLE’S VOICE: Well, I didn’t come up with it, okay?? Now could you just let me finish this voice-over? Ah, crap, I’m already out of ti-

(We then fade in to a montage of scenes, all with dramatic music playing in the background. First up, Graham Aker standing on a dusty plateau in the desert, wielding a katana and facing off against Setsuna, who only has a knife.)

GRAHAM: You call that a knife?? THIS… (Waves sword) -is a knife.

SETSUNA: That’s completely inaccurate.

GRAHAM: (Narrows eyes) YOU’RE inaccurate.

SETSUNA: Fine. (Switches knife to underhanded grip and tenses up) Let’s do this.

(Graham gets into a fighting stance as well and the two face off. After a second or two of further tension, Graham charges, screaming a battle cry. Suddenly, just before Graham reaches Setsuna, the young Gundam Meister reaches up and snags a rope that has apparently draped down from the sky. Graham wildly swipes as Setsuna is yanked upwards by the rope and pulled away.)

GRAHAM: (Angry) What??

(We see Setsuna hanging from a rope that is hanging from the underside of the Ptolemaios as it passes overhead. Setsuna puts the knife in his teeth and flashes a peace symbol at Graham as he flies away. Graham looks absolutely furious. He raises his sword to the sky.)

GRAHAM: (Screams) NYAAAAAGHHH!!!

(We cut to a scene of the Ptolemaios, flying through space with a ship fast pursuing. The pursuing ship has flashing sirens and we can hear it making noise, despite it being space. We cut to the bridge of the Ptolemy, focusing on Sumeragi and Lasse in their seats.)

SUMERAGI: Crap, the space fuzz are still on our tail!

LASSE: I am NOT going back to the big house.

SUMERAGI: Floor it, Lasse!

(Lasse grits his teeth and tightens his grip on the Ptolemy’s controls. We cut back outside, where the Ptolemaios begins flying through space slightly faster. Cut to a scene of Setsuna pointing his pistol at someone.)

SETSUNA: Who the hell ARE you guys?

(We see he’s pointing his pistol at a group of new characters- all Innovators/Innovades.)

INNOVATOR # 1: (Smiles) We’re Innovators, Setsuna F. Seiei. I’m Reclaim Acclimate

INNOVATOR # 2: And I’m Free Healthcare!

INNOVATOR # 3: I’m Idiotic Idiocy.

INNOVATOR # 4: My name is Wankem Willpower.

(Setsuna narrows his eyes and tenses up on the trigger as the camera dramatically zooms in on his face.)

SETSUNA: (Teeth gritted) Here we go again…

(Cut to an extremely-brief scene of Allelujah and Marie riding one of those two-seater bicycles in a public park and laughing inanely. We then cut to a scene in the med-bay of the Ptolemy. We see Linda Vashti sitting in a chair with her back to us, while Ian stands over her, examining her face.)

IAN: Okay, almost done, honey.

LINDA: (Pleasantly) Yes, dear.

(Suddenly, the door slides open, revealing Feldt, Setsuna, and Mileina.)

FELDT: Ian, Ms. Sumeragi wants us to- NNHH!!

MILEINA: (Frightened) MAMA!

IAN: (Stammering) W-wait, I can explain…

(The scene cuts to a view from the others’ perspective, and we see that Linda’s face is swung-open on a hinge, revealing a robotic face underneath. It sorta resembles a Gundam’s mask. Setsuna’s eyes widen.)

SETSUNA: (Confused) Linda…is Gundam?

IAN: Well…yeah, a little.

FELDT: (Frowns) Wait a second…if Linda is a robot…(Points at Mileina) -what does that make her?

MILEINA: (Confused) Am I part-robot then? (Suddenly brightens up) This means I’m just like Erde-san! We’re perfect for each other now!

IAN: Now let’s not go nuts, honey.

(Cut to a brief scene of Billy intently staring at a computer screen.)

BILLY: Oh…oh my god. OH MY GOD!

GRAHAM: (From off-screen) AKER MAXIMUM!!!

(Suddenly Graham runs in from off-screen and abruptly stabs Billy’s computer monitor with a katana, screaming. Billy falls out of his chair in shock. Graham continues to slash at the remains of the monitor for several seconds before finally calming down and composing himself. Billy stands up.)

BILLY: Graham??

GRAHAM: (Reassuringly) It’s alright. That computer won’t bother you again.

(Cut to a scene in a darkened room in the Ptolemy. Lasse stands over a table, shirtless and shuffling things around. Saji paces back and forth behind him, looking panicked.)

SAJI: (Freaking out) Oh man, oh man! They’ve overrun the whole ship! What do we do, man? What do we do??

(Lasse turns around, he now has bandoliers of ammunition strapped over his bare chest and is brandishing two shotguns. He pumps them both single-handedly.)

LASSE: (Grimly) Let’s go fishing.

(Cut to a scene of Reclaim Acclimate, confronting Setsuna, Saji, Allelujah, and Ian.)

SETSUNA: What did you DO to us??

RECLAIM: I infected you all with a potent GN poison. Not only are you doomed, but so is everyone you’ve touched!

IAN: Linda! I’ve signed her death warrant!

ALLELUJAH: I gave Marie…the kiss of death!

SAJI: Louise…in deadly danger!

SETSUNA: Gundam- what have I done to you?

(Cut to a scene of the RAPHAEL Gundam floating through space and under fire from enemy mobile suits. The giant arms on its backpack suddenly snatch an enemy mobile suit from the sky and tear it to shreds between them. In the Gundam’s cockpit, Tieria sits, now looking like a hologram made of GN particles.)

TIERIA: (Annoyed) I’m made of the warm light from Setsuna’s heart, dammit! Know my tightly-coiled anger!

(Cut to a scene of the Gundam HARUTE, in its flight mode, zipping through a curtain of beam fire. In the cockpit, Allelujah looks determined and hits a giant red button in the middle of his dashboard labeled “MISSILES”. The Harute transforms to mobile suit mode and begins spinning like the Tasmanian Devil, firing a seemingly endless supply of GN missiles in all directions. It abruptly stops and inside the cockpit, Allelujah quickly removes his helmet and vomits all over himself.)

ALLELUJAH: (Coughing, feebly) Why would someone think this was a good idea??

(Cut to a scene of the Gundam ZABANYA, carefully aiming an enhanced GN Sniper Rifle. We cut inside the cockpit to see Lyle Dylandy, gritting his teeth and tensely aiming with his cockpit’s rifle controller. The Zabanya fires and the shot streaks out, towards a tiny fence miles off in the distance, on which sits a row of beer cans. The shot totally vaporizes the entire section of fence that the cans were resting on. Cut back to Lyle, who pulls away from his rifle controller with a satisfied smirk. Yellow Haro chirps in delight next to him.)

YELLOW HARO: Nice shooting, Lockon! Nice shooting, Lockon!

LYLE: Oh yeah, we bad.

(Cut to a scene of the 00-QUANTA, deploying Sword Bits from its shield to “crucify” an enemy mobile suit approaching it. In the Gundam’s cockpit, Setsuna looks fired-up.)

SETSUNA: (Screams) WE ARE ALL GUNDAM! And THIS…

(The 00-Quanta deploys its new GN Sword with a flourish, then flies directly at the camera with it.)

SETSUNA: -IS MY BOOMSWORD!

(As the Gundam flies into the camera, the main title comes up; “GUNDAM 00: MIGHTY MEISTER ALIEN FIGHTERS- THE MOVIE”. The screen fades to black and the crowd begins to cheer enthusiastically. Patrick walks back to the center of the stage as the screen slides back up and the cheering subsides.)

PATRICK: That was great, wasn’t it?

LACUS: (From the front row) Eh, ours’ll be better.

KIRA: When it happens.

LACUS: Oh it’s totally happening. For real. Just you wait.

SHINN: (Shouts) EN-CORE! EN-CORE! EN-CORE!

PATRICK: (Annoyed) Be quiet. (Brightens up again) Ahem, now, let’s-

(Suddenly, we hear a song start to play. It sounds vaguely muffled.)

SONG: (Emanating from somewhere) He faced the galloping hordes- A hundred bad guys with swords! Who sent those goons to their lords? Why, PRINCE ALIIIIIIIII!!!

(The song continues for several seconds. Everyone on-stage looks at Ali, who is sitting casually and smiling politely. He takes a quick look around and notes everyone is looking at him. He looks at his watch absently and coughs. Patrick looks annoyed.)

PATRICK: Ah-HEM.

ALI: (Grins) Eh? Oh right, that’s me. Hold on.

(Ali takes his cell phone out and answers it. Everyone continues remaining quiet.)

ALI: (On phone) Yo. Sup. (Pause) Uh-huh. (Pause) Oh really. (Pause) I dunno…that’s gonna… (Pause) Well, how much? (Pause) Uh-huh. (Pause) That IS a lot… (Pause) Yeah. (Pause) Okay. (Pause) No, YOU the man. (Pauses, then laughs) No, you. (Pauses) Okay. (Pause) Yeah, I’ll tell them. (Pause) Okay. Bye.

(Ali folds his cell phone back up and sticks it in his pocket again. Patrick looks at him with an annoyed expression.)

PATRICK: You done?

ALI: (Smirks) Oh yeah. Sorry. Just accepted a new job.

PATRICK: Can we move on?

ALI: (Shakes his head) Actually, this is something I gotta do right now.

(Ali stands abruptly, Patrick walks over to him.)

PATRICK: Wait, wait, you can’t leave yet! The show’s not over.

ALI: Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere yet…now where did I put that…?

(Ali shuffles around in his jacket pockets. Patrick sighs in irritation.)

PATRICK: Look, if you could just…

ALI: (Smiles) Ah-HA!

(Ali turns and looks to the front row of the audience, directly at Shinn.)

ALI: Get your cell phone ready, kid.

SHINN: (Frantically) Oh, oh!

(Shinn fumbles with Mayu’s cell phone, finally holding it to Ali. Once Ali sees the camera on him, he grins and turns to the rest of the cast. Suspiciously, Neil leans forward in his seat.)

NEIL: (Glaring) What the hell are you planning, you son of a bitch?

ALI: (Grinning) Oh, you’ll like this.

(Ali casually removes a pistol from inside his jacket, pivots and shoots Tieria directly in the head.)

TIERIA: Uk-!

(Tieria immediately pitches back in his seat, blood spurting from a hole in his forehead. The rest of the cast immediately react with horror.)

MILEINA: (Screams) AIEEEEEEEEEEEE-DESU!!!

SUMERAGI: (Shouts) TIERIA!!!

MARINA: (Mildly concerned) Oh my…

NEIL: (Springs up) YOU BASTARD!

LYLE: (Springs up) PIECE OF-

(Setsuna, Lyle, and Neil all spring up and start reaching for their own weapons, but Ali immediately drops his smoking pistol and raises his arms above in head in surrender.)

ALI: Whoa, whoa! It’s cool, I’m done.

SETSUNA: (Heatedly) You murdered Tieria Erde!

LYLE: Monster, I KNEW we couldn’t trust-

ALI: That was it, okay? That was all I was paid to do. I strongly suggest everyone locate their chill.

NEIL: (Snarls) Shut your ZOINKing mouth!

PATRICK: (Trying to calm everyone) Everyone settle down, settle- !

(Lyle roughly grabs Ali by the shirt collar and presses a pistol to his cheek.)

ALI: Hey, hey! Easy with the material!

LYLE: Give me ONE ZOINKing reason not to blow your brains out again!

ALI: Let me go, cowboy. I’m not the one you wanna fight.

LYLE: Huh?

(Lyle lets Ali go and he straightens his shirt out, then motions to the back of the auditorium. All eyes follow.)

ALI: I’d like to introduce my sponsor. Actually, I’m told he’s the sponsor for this whole show.

PATRICK: (Confused) Huh?

(Ali casually motions to the rear of the auditorium. All eyes follow.)

ALI: That’s your cue, boss.

(At the rear of the auditorium, double-doors open, and RIBBONS ALMARK strides in, smirking confidently. He’s followed/flanked by REVIVE REVIVAL, HILING CARE, BRING STABITY, REGENE REGETTA, DEVINE NOVA, and ANEW RETURNER. On stage, Setsuna springs up from his seat in shock.)

SETSUNA: Ribbons Almark!!!

RIBBONS: (Evenly) Setsuna F. Seiei.

(Lyle drops his pistol in shock, gaping at the newly-arrived Innovades.)

LYLE: A-Anew?

(Anew meets Lyle’s gaze and quickly looks away.)

ANEW: (Shyly) Lyle.

(The Innovades confidently stride down the middle row of the auditorium. Ribbons in particular holds himself like he owns the place. They finally halt right in front of the stage, as the rest of the 00 cast stare at them.)

RIBBONS: (Still smirking) So at last, the gang’s all here. (Regards Ali) Check’s in the mail, that will be all.

(Ali gives a jaunty little salute and smirk and casually walks back to his seat. Setsuna’s expression twists into a frown.)

SETSUNA: (To Ribbons) So you’re still alive, Ribbons Almark!

RIBBONS: (Shrugs) Of course I am. I have an inexhaustible supply of new cloned bodies. (Motions around the Innovades) For all my progeny.

HILING: (Speaks up, smiling impishly) That means we never die, yo.

(Setsuna grits his teeth in anger. Ribbons smirks even more and regards Patrick.)

RIBBONS: As Mr. Al Saachez mentioned, it was I who provided the funds to produce this show and hired you as the host. (Cocks his head) A little gratitude would be nice.

PATRICK: (Confused) Wait, they told me I was hired because of my inherent awesomeness!

RIBBONS: No, no. You were just a convenient, familiar face. Really, a barely-trained chimp could host this drivel.

SHINN: (Off-screen) Aw snap!

(Patrick’s expression sags in disappointment. Sumeragi gets up from her seat and walks over to stand beside Setsuna.)

SUMERAGI: (To Ribbons) How did you manage to activate new bodies for yourselves and the others if Tieria was in control of Veda?

RIBBONS: (Smugly) Well-

(Suddenly, Regene leaps in front of Ribbons, cutting him off.)

REGENE: (Grinning) I’ll field this one, Reee-bonzzz.

(Ribbons looks incredibly annoyed, but remains silent. Regene addresses Sumeragi and the rest of the on-stage cast, still grinning widely.)

REGENE: Thanks to my near-identical genetic structure to Tieria, I was able to “fool” Veda into allowing me access to the clone tanks, and thus was the undeniable key to our resurrection.

(Regene folds his arms and closes his eyes, looking self-satisfied, while Ribbons continues to look annoyed off to the side.)

SUMERAGI: (To Regene) Didn’t you initially want to take over the Aeolia Plan from Ribbons?

REGENE: (Opens eyes and looks to Sumeragi) Oh yeah, but then I figured it’d get Reee-bonzzz here much more riled-up if I, Re-gen-e Re-get-ta, was the key to our eventual return. Especially since he baked-up so many fail-cakes towards the end of the series there. (Regene looks over at Ribbons, smirking) I mean, Trans-Am suicide clones? Whose retarded idea was that???

(On stage, Billy tugs at his collar and coughs uncomfortably. Ribbons shoves Regene aside, looking angry and clears his throat.)

RIBBONS: No matter HOW we got back, our mission remains the same! Innovators are superior. We are meant to rule. And that means we don’t have to indulge you pathetic humans if we don’t want t- ANEW!!!

(Somehow, when no one was looking, Lyle got off-stage and is now making out with Anew off to the side of Ribbons’ group. Anew breaks off, composes herself, and looks to Ribbons.)

ANEW: Oh, sorry.

RIBBONS: Seriously, do I have to quantum brainwave-control you to keep you in line from now on?

REVIVE: Just don’t trying linking to her when she’s…occupied…like that. Trust me, I’ve seen things I can’t unsee.

LYLE: (Winks at Revive) Oh come on, you probably liked it.

REVIVE: (Screams) I’M A DUDE!

LYLE: (Horrified) GAH!!!

REVIVE: (Shrugs) Well, if you wanna get technical about it, I have no gender.

LYLE: Wow, that makes me feel…not better at all.

ANEW: (Hesitantly) Please, Lyle. You don’t have to oppose us. We can be together if you just accept our way is best.

(Lyle looks conflicted for a moment and puts his hand on his chin, thinking.)

LYLE: Y’know…maybe you’ve got something there…maybe…

(Lyle looks up on-stage and catches Setsuna’s glance. Their eyes lock and a mutual understanding passes between them. Lyle allows himself a small smirk, then turns back to Anew.)

LYLE: You know what? I think I will join you guys and-

(Suddenly a gunshot rings out and Lyle frantically ducks. He looks wildly up at Setsuna, who is pointing a smoking pistol at him.)

LYLE: (Flustered) AH! What the hell, kid???

SETSUNA: (Confused) What? Wasn’t that your “shoot me, I’ve got a plan” face?

LYLE: (Angry) No! Well, yes…but not the shooting part!

SETSUNA: (Holsters his gun again) I apologize, I mis-read the situation.

RIBBONS: (Annoyed) Enough of this buffoonery! We are to prove we are superior by way of FORCE!

PATRICK: Now wait a minute…

RIBBONS: -And of course, the only way to do that…is by way of EPIC GIANT ROBOT BATTLE!!!

(Behind the Innovades and still sitting and witnessing this spectacle, Lunamaria sighs in annoyance, while Shinn looks pumped.)

SHINN: (Excited) Yeah, dawg, yeah!

LUNA: My god, we Gundam characters are really narrow-minded, aren’t we?

(Next to her Athrun also sighs and nods.)

ATHRUN: Yep. Settle a dispute? Epic Giant Robot Battle. Elect ruler of Earth? Epic Giant Robot Battle. Argument over who does the dishes? Epic Giant Robot Battle.

(Back on stage, Setsuna steps forward and motions at Ribbons.)

SETSUNA: (Shouts) We’ll take you on for the good of the future! (Turns to Saji) Saji Crossroad!

(Saji points at himself, looking confused.)

SAJI: Me?

SETSUNA: Yes. Pilot the 0-Raiser!

SAJI: (Taken aback) What?

(Louise pinches Saji’s ear.)

LOUISE: Do it, Saji!

SAJI: Ow! But Louise…I…I can’t…

LOUISE: (Sighs) Okay, FINE! I’ll pilot it! (Stands and looks to Setsuna) Let’s go, Setsuna!

SETSUNA: (Nods approvingly) Louise Halevy.

SAJI: What? No! Louise, you can’t-!

LOUISE: I can too! And you’re coming with me!

SAJI: What? But-!

LOUISE: (Grabs Saji by the ear) No buts!

SAJI: (Being dragged up) Ow! Ow!

(Lyle climbs back on-stage, walks over and slaps Saji on the side of the head.)

LYLE: Don’t be such a Saji, kid!

SAJI: (Annoyed) I AM Saji!

LYLE: Oh, right. In whatever case, I’m with you, Setsuna!

SETSUNA: (Approvingly) Lyle Dylandy.

LYLE: (Resolutely) I’m gonna take my woman back! Again! And this time don’t kill her!

SETSUNA: (Nods) Roger.

(Lyle turns to regard Allelujah and Marie, who are both still sitting down.)

LYLE: Allelujah?

(Allelujah sadly shakes his head.)

ALLELUJAH: Sorry guys, but Marie and I are going to sit this one out.

MARIE: This isn’t our fight anymore.

LYLE: (Smiles) That’s fine, I understand.

SAJI: Hey! They get understanding for not wanting to fight and I get pushed around? What the hell!

(Neil walks up behind the others.)

NEIL: I’d love to help, but the rules say dead guys can’t.

LYLE: (Scoffs) What? Their dead guys are helping.

HILING: (Speaks up) Yeah, but we’re just in new cloned bodies, so we count as different people. (Sticks her tongue out) Nyeh.

LYLE: Also, what “rules”?

NEIL: (Shrugs) I dunno. There are apparently rules.

(Ali walks up behind Neil and Lyle.)

ALI: Yeah, I can’t fight either.

NEIL: (Doesn’t look back) You shut the hell up.

ALI: (Grins) Just sayin’, don’t expect anymore trouble from me, friend-o.

(Both Neil and Lyle grit their teeth in anger and simultaneously turn to Ali.)

NEIL+ LYLE: (Angry) SHUT UP!

ALI: (Raises his hands) Whoa, in stereo. But hey, honestly guys, why you being all grudge-y? We’re best pals on that new Fullsteel Biochemist whachacallit show.

NEIL: (Mad) Only our voices are!

LYLE: (Points at Ali) You just get the hell away from us!

(Ali smirks again, sticks his hands in his pockets, and saunters away again. Neil turns to Lyle, a serious expression on his face.)

NEIL: You go do what you have to do. Support that impossible Gundam fanboy.

SHINN: (From off-screen) You mean me??

(Neil and Lyle both look off-screen toward Shinn.)

NEIL + LYLE: (Simultaneously) NO.

SHINN: (Off-screen) Aw.

(Neil and Lyle lock eyes again. A small, sad smile forms on Lyle’s face.)

LYLE: Don’t worry, I’ll back Setsuna up as much as I can. But first, I gotta reach Anew. I know I can change her mind.

NEIL: (Smiles the same smile as Lyle) Putting your own needs first. I guess we’re a lot alike.

LYLE: (Warmly) Yeah. Be seeing you, Patch.

NEIL: Take care, little brother.

(The brothers Dylandy exchange a quick handshake, then Lyle moves to stand next to Setsuna, who has been joined by Louise and the very reluctant-looking Saji. Ribbons motions threateningly at Setsuna.)

RIBBONS: Face us, Celestial Being! Face your doom!!!

LYLE: Geez, even your clichés are clichéd!

SETSUNA: (Nods) Let’s do this.

(Behind Setsuna and the rest, Sumeragi whispers over to Lasse.)

SUMERAGI: Can we back them up?

LASSE: (Shrugs) With warm wishes and burning courage, sure.

SUMERAGI: (Sighs) That’s what I thought.

(Billy turns to talk to Graham.)

BILLY: Graham, what do you make of all th-

(Graham is no longer in his seat. Billy blinks in confusion.)

BILLY: …Graham?

(We jump-cut to the sky above the auditorium. Celestial Being’s available mobile suits face off against the Innovade mobile sits. Setsuna pilots the 00-RAISER, wielding its GN SWORD III. Saji is in the 0-RAISER’s cockpit, along with Louise, who is sitting on his lap and holding the controls. Saji struggles to look around her.)

SAJI: (Pleadingly) Please, Louise, at least let me configure the Raiser-System. You don’t even know how to-

LOUISE: Psh. If YOU can do it, then I certainly can.

SAJI: Yeah, but-

LOUISE: No more backtalk! Now c’mon! We’re gonna teach those inhuman Innovator freaks a lesson!

SAJI: But technically you and Setsuna are-

LOUISE: (Shrieks) SAJI! WHAT DID I JUST SAY???

SAJI: (Meekly) Louise, maybe you should take some more pills before…

LOUISE: No, no pills! I need the edge here. (Shrieks again) FEMININE RAAAAAAAA-GGGGGE!!!

(Saji just shuts up and looks resigned to his fate/somewhat frightened. Next to the 00-RAISER, Lyle pilots the CHERUDIM GUNDAM, decked out in its heavy weapons configuration.)

LYLE: (To Haro) Alright, partner, let’s beat the bell-bottoms off them!

YELLOW HARO: Hell yeah! Hell yeah!

(Across from the two Gundams floats the Innovade suits. Bring Stabity in a GARAZZO, Revive Revival in a GADESSA, Anew Returner in a GADDESS, Devine Nova in an EMPRUSS, and Hiling Care looming over the rest in a REGNANT with her custom colors. In front of all of them, the REBORNS GUNDAM with Ribbons Almark in the cockpit floats confidentially and in charge.)

RIBBONS: (Smirks) We outnumber you fools almost three-to-one! You have no chance to-

(Ribbons suddenly frowns and looks around. The Reborns Gundam looks back and forth for a moment.)

RIBBONS: Wait…someone’s missing.

(The other Innovade suits all seem to look around in a confused manner.)

RIBBONS: Regene. Where is Regene Regetta???

REGENE: (Off-screen) Re-gen-e Re-get-ta is right here!

(The SERAVEE GUNDAM, decked out in its heavy weapons configuration, suddenly pulls up alongside 00-Raiser and Cherudim, with Regene at the controls.)

RIBBONS: You’re…with them?

REGENE: (Smiles) Surprise, Reeeee-bonz.

(The Reborns Gundam shakes its fist at Seravee in an indignant manner.)

RIBBONS: (Comically) Curse your sudden yet inevitable betrayal!

LYLE: (Smirks) Alright, the odds are looking a bit better.

(Ribbons composes himself again.)

RIBBONS: This matters not one whit! You’re all going down like Lalah Sune!

SETSUNA: (Intently) Setsuna F. Seiei, 00-Raiser! Clearing a path to the future!

RIBBONS: (Intently) Amuro Ray, Gundam! IKI-MAAAAAAAH-aaaaa…(Gets flustered) -Erm, uh. Ribbons Almark! Reborns Gundam, attack!

HILING: (Excited) IT’S AWNNNNNNNN!

(All the suits rush at each other.)

To be CONCLUDED!
Last edited by Thundermuffin on Mon Jan 18, 2010 12:05 am, edited 1 time in total.
Dean_the_Young
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

Ali is, by far, superior.
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

"LACUS: (From the front row) Eh, ours’ll be better.
"KIRA: When it happens."
"LACUS: Oh it’s totally happening. For real. Just you wait."
This one had me dying. :D
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

(Cut to a scene in a darkened room in the Ptolemy. Lasse stands over a table, shirtless and shuffling things around. Saji paces back and forth behind him, looking panicked.)

SAJI: (Freaking out) Oh man, oh man! They’ve overrun the whole ship! What do we do, man? What do we do??

(Lasse turns around, he now has bandoliers of ammunition strapped over his bare chest and is brandishing two shotguns. He pumps them both single-handedly.)

LASSE: (Grimly) Let’s go fishing.
Just what kind of fish are they after anyway? :shock:
(Cut to a scene of Reclaim Acclimate, confronting Setsuna, Saji, Allelujah, and Ian.)

SETSUNA: What did you DO to us??

RECLAIM: I infected you all with a potent GN poison. Not only are you doomed, but so is everyone you’ve touched!

IAN: Linda! I’ve signed her death warrant!

ALLELUJAH: I gave Marie…the kiss of death!

SAJI: Louise…in deadly danger!

SETSUNA: Gundam- what have I done to you?
Someone paid a visit to Superdickery recently.
(Cut to a scene of the Gundam HARUTE, in its flight mode, zipping through a curtain of beam fire. In the cockpit, Allelujah looks determined and hits a giant red button in the middle of his dashboard labeled “MISSILES”. The Harute transforms to mobile suit mode and begins spinning like the Tasmanian Devil, firing a seemingly endless supply of GN missiles in all directions. It abruptly stops and inside the cockpit, Allelujah quickly removes his helmet and vomits all over himself.)

ALLELUJAH: (Coughing, feebly) Why would someone think this was a good idea??
Oh come on, Itano-san would be proud. :mrgreen:
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

^^

I knew that line about the "kiss of death" seemed familiar!
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

ZeroBusterXX wrote:^^

I knew that line about the "kiss of death" seemed familiar!
Someone care to elaborate for me?
I'm sorry this letter is so long, but I did not have time to make it shorter. -Mark Twain

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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

Dean_the_Young wrote:
ZeroBusterXX wrote:^^

I knew that line about the "kiss of death" seemed familiar!
Someone care to elaborate for me?
That whole exchange was a rip-off of this comic book panel.

And hey, I knew about that panel long before Superdickery even existed!

Anyway, I had to use it after my friend compared it to the end of that one 00 ep in S2 when everyone rattles off their loved one and Setsuna answers with "Gundam".
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

Because this hit me right on the money:
(As the Gundam flies into the camera, the main title comes up; “GUNDAM 00: MIGHTY MEISTER ALIEN FIGHTERS- THE MOVIE”. The screen fades to black and the crowd begins to cheer enthusiastically. Patrick walks back to the center of the stage as the screen slides back up and the cheering subsides.)
PATRICK: That was great, wasn’t it?
LACUS: (From the front row) Eh, ours’ll be better.
KIRA: When it happens.
LACUS: Oh it’s totally happening. For real. Just you wait.
:mrgreen:
-We will not be caught by surprise!
*Almost everyone I've killed uttered similar last words.
-Then I am glad once again that you are on my side.
*They've often said that too.
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

Antares wrote:Because this hit me right on the money:
(As the Gundam flies into the camera, the main title comes up; “GUNDAM 00: MIGHTY MEISTER ALIEN FIGHTERS- THE MOVIE”. The screen fades to black and the crowd begins to cheer enthusiastically. Patrick walks back to the center of the stage as the screen slides back up and the cheering subsides.)
PATRICK: That was great, wasn’t it?
LACUS: (From the front row) Eh, ours’ll be better.
KIRA: When it happens.
LACUS: Oh it’s totally happening. For real. Just you wait.
:mrgreen:
You guys know it's still happening, right? Totally. It totally is getting made. Any year now. I bet it'll be titled "Gundam Seed Forever". 8)
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

Are you sure that's not Gundam SEED Never? Great line by the way, nailed the humor of the situation dead-on.
Thundermuffin wrote:SETSUNA: (Confused) Linda…is Gundam?
Ian: Hands off, Gundam freak. She's mine.
MILEINA: (Confused) Am I part-robot then? (Suddenly brightens up) This means I’m just like Erde-san! We’re perfect for each other now!
Why am I suddenly imagining an epic scene of Mileina's hair piercing the heavens?
MILEINA: (Screams) AIEEEEEEEEEEEE-DESU!!!
Had me rolling in the aisles.
REVIVE: Just don’t trying linking to her when she’s…occupied…like that. Trust me, I’ve seen things I can’t unsee.
Poor Revive can never look at whipped cream again without feeling ill. And thus was invented GN Brain Bleach.
REVIVE: (Shrugs) Well, if you wanna get technical about it, I have no gender.
Anew: Uhh, if you want to get technical, neither do I.
Lyle: Gah!
ATHRUN: Yep. Settle a dispute? Epic Giant Robot Battle. Elect ruler of Earth? Epic Giant Robot Battle. Argument over who does the dishes? Epic Giant Robot Battle.
Evening at Cagalli's, when a simple family get-together turns to violence.
RIBBONS: (Comically) Curse your sudden yet inevitable betrayal!
Epic. Win. Just one question? Do I really wanna know which Innovade is the Zoe to his Wash? :shock:
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

Arsarcana wrote:
RIBBONS: (Comically) Curse your sudden yet inevitable betrayal!
Epic. Win. Just one question? Do I really wanna know which Innovade is the Zoe to his Wash? :shock:
Uh, Hiling, I guess. Although I suppose Revive is a bit more like Zoe...

Ribbons is definitely not a leaf on the wind though. :)
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

Very close to completing the final part to what may be my final one of these things...EVAR. (Until the one after that.)

Accordingly, here's a preview line.
MR. BUSHIDO: (Smirks) So it shall be! Arch-enemies working together for the same goal! Is there anything more romantic?
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

He's talking to the Gundam, isn't he?
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

Arsarcana wrote:He's talking to the Gundam, isn't he?

I dunno.... Isn't it Setsuna that he loves?
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

And now, the double-sized conclusion!

-

(Somewhere, Graham enters a room by himself. There’s an explosion heard in the distance, and the building shakes a little. Graham looks at the ceiling briefly.)

GRAHAM: Hm, it appears the battle has been joined.

(His eyes dash back and forth, making sure the coast is clear, then pulls a briefcase out of nowhere. He opens it, revealing his MR. BUSHIDO garb and mask neatly folded within. Graham regards it solemnly for a moment.)

GRAHAM: (Focused) Let’s Samurize, guise.

(Meanwhile, outside in the skies above, the 00-Raiser smashes into the Reborns, knocking it back, but quickly finds itself under fire from the Gadessa and Regnant. The Garazzo and Empruss fly directly at the Seravee, but are forced to veer off as the Gundam unleashes a series of staggered GN Cannon bursts. And the Gaddess and the Cherudim enter their own little dance of death, strafing each other with beam fire. Back on the ground, most of the audience has cleared out of the auditorium in a panic. The roof of the building has been opened and the rest of the 00 cast just watch the battle from the remains of the stage. Patrick is on his hands and knees, completely despondent.)

PATRICK: All I had to do was prevent THIS from happening! And I couldn’t even do that! Kati’s right! I’m an appalling failure! An appallingly-handsome failure!

(Ali walks up beside him, hands casually in his pockets and comfortingly pats Patrick on the back.)

ALI: Eh, don’t worry about it. Stuff happens. I remember this one time, I sent this suicide bomber out to blow up this town square, and the dumb ZOINK went to wrong place and-

(Ali turns slightly and notices Neil and several other cast members glaring hatefully at him.)

ALI: (Clears throat) …I’ll continue this story at a more appropriate time.

(Meanwhile, Mileina is staring mournfully at Tieria’s corpse, still slumped back in his chair and leaking blood from his forehead. Ian takes her by the shoulders and leads her away.)

IAN: Come on, sweetie, he’ll be back. Probably.

MILEINA: (Between sobs) But, Papa…

IAN: Besides, if you got married, you’d grow to be an old hag while he never aged, so he’d probably end up leaving you anyway.

MILEINA: (Crying harder) Daaaa-ad! That’s terrible!

IAN: Well, it’s kinda like me and your mom, only reversed. Your mom will never age because she’s a robot. But she’ll never leave me cuz I made her. Right, hon?

(Linda looks over at Ian and smiles.)

LINDA: (Pleasantly) Yes, dear.

(Mileina looks even more distraught and latches on to Feldt’s arm, sobbing into her jacket sleeve.)

MILEINA: (Screaming) AUGHUHUAHAHAH!

FELDT: (Monotone) Yes, yes. Let it all out. Ruin my jacket. There’s a good girl.

(Meanwhile in the front row of the audience, Shinn and the rest watch the battle unfold above them. Shinn is starting to look antsy, gripping a soda can in his hand tightly.)

LUNA: What’s wrong, Shinn?

SHINN: (Sourly) Nothing.

LUNA: (Reaches over and strokes his hair) C’mon, tell me. Did you run out of wa-wa in your ba-ba?

SHINN: (Annoyed) There’s a more than adequate amount of wa-wa remaining in my ba-ba, Luna!

(To illustrate, Shinn takes a quick swig of his soda, then forcefully slams it back onto the arm of his seat.)

LUNA: Then what’s wrong? Aren’t you enjoying the show?

SHINN: That’s not it…it’s just…I should be up there, helping them!

LUNA: Shinn, this isn’t our fight. We don’t have to get involved. And besides, remember the last Reunion Special?

(Shinn looks over at Luna, confused.)

SHINN: Yeah, and?

LUNA: (Rolls her eyes) You totally started that whole fight last time!

SHINN: Nuh-uh!

LUNA: Yuh-huh. What, all of a sudden you can’t have spontaneous flashbacks? Is your memory broken?

SHINN: (Folds his arms) Whatever I did, it was totally justified! And I’ll have you know I have a photographic memory! I used it to solve mysteries in a popular series of children’s novels. I think.

LUNA: (Sighs) Oy. Look…just please stay calm for now, okay?

SHINN: (Looks away) Maybe.

(Meanwhile in the air, beams fly everywhere. The 00-Raiser desperately weaves through enemy fire as the Reborns Cannon and Gadessa try to catch Setsuna in a crossfire. Suddenly, a massive blast materializes in front of 00-Raiser, forcing Setsuna to wildly bank into more beam fire. The blast bends and follows him.)

SETSUNA: (Grits teeth) Damn.

(The 00-Raiser generates a GN Field around itself as multiple beams crash into it, buffeting everyone inside the Gundam around.)

LOUISE: Agh! Make it stop, Saji!

SAJI: What the heck am I supposed to do??

SETSUNA: (Strained) Hold on-!

(The 00-Raiser breaks free of the barrage, only to find the Regnant in mobile suit mode looming over it from above. In its cockpit, Hiling grins.)

HILING: Gotcha!!!

(The Regnant fires off its taser-whips, seeking to ensnare the 00-Raiser, but Setsuna whips his GN Sword III around and slashes them out of the air. He flies up and over the Regnant as it swipes at him with a giant clawed hand. Inside the 0-Raiser’s cockpit, Louise’s eyes widen with recognition.)

LOUISE: Hey…that’s MY old unit she’s flying!

See Hiling’s Custom Regnant.

HILING: (Grins) Not anymore, little girl! Ribbons granted it to ME now, as it should have been in the first place! I’m the bitchiest bitch that ever bitched a bitch!

LOUISE: (Narrows eyes) Oh, not EVEN. No one out-bitches ME!

(As the Gundam tries to climb higher and away from the Regnant, the 0-Raiser’s cockpit suddenly straightens out and starts pulling the rest of the suit backwards. In his cockpit, Setsuna seems totally flabbergasted.)

SETSUNA: (Startled) Louise Halevy!

SAJI: (Groans) Yeah, she does this.

(The 00-Raiser continues flying backwards, now chasing the Regnant around. Meanwhile, the Cherudim and Gaddess strafe each other with beam fire.)

LYLE: Anew! You don’t have to do this again!

ANEW: I do, Lyle. I’m only an instrument wielded by Ribbons.

LYLE: You’re not just an extension of that guy’s will! You’re a person, dammit! A person with flawless skin and perfect breasts!

ANEW: Lyle…

(The Gaddess launches off its Fangs, forcing the Cherudim to dodge wildly as the beam-tipped remote weapons careen at it from all angles.)

LYLE: Dammit, woman, do not start this crap!

ANEW: (Pleading) Please, Lyle, just stand down.

LYLE: Oh no, I’m just rollin’ up my sleeves!

(The Cherudim moves in closer to the Gaddess, even as the Fangs zip around it. Close by, the Garazzo attacks the Seravee.)

BRING: (Flatly) Surrender, Regene.

REGENE: (Grins) Come on, Burrrr-ing! Have some imagination for once. My side is totally gonna win.

(As the Seravee tries to back away from the approaching Garazzo, firing GN Cannon bursts, the Empruss attacks from the opposite direction.)

DEVINE: (Also flatly) If you won’t surrender, we’ll simply eliminate you.

(The Empruss fires a large blast that the Seravee barely blocks from behind with a GN Field. The Garazzo opens up with its beam machineguns, trying to pin Seravee down. In Seravee’s cockpit, Regene just maintains a cocky smile.)

REGENE: You guys? Eliminate me? Sure, bring it on, Blunder Twins. No wonder Ribbons felt your Innovade model was best suited as cannon fodder.

(Both Bring and Devine bristle with rage in their cockpits, but remain silent and continue attacking the Seravee. Back on the ground, everyone continues to watch the battle above. Patrick is standing now, looking a bit less distraught than before.)

PATRICK: We…we’ve gotta to put an end to this fast! If Kati…if the Colonel…if the General finds out things have gone to crap, I’m not sleepin’ in the bed tonight!

LASSE: (Smirks) Couch duty, eh?

(Patrick looks back at Lasse with a worried expression.)

PATRICK: Man, I’ll be lucky if she’ll let me sleep on the LAWN.

MR. BUSHIDO: (Off-screen) Have no fear, lowlies.

(Everyone turns to look up at a balcony in the auditorium, where MR. BUSHIDO is standing on the edge, arms folded. On stage, Billy facepalms.)

BILLY: Oh lord.

PATRICK: Mr. Bushido!

MR. BUSHIDO: (Sternly) That’s “Mister” Bushido to you!

(Mr. Bushido takes a step off the balcony and promptly plummets straight down, falling and crashing behind some seats to the left of the stage, out of view. Everyone else stares dumbfounded and silent, except for the flash and click of Mayu’s cellphone, which Shinn quickly snaps up. Without missing a beat, Mr. Bushido stands up from behind the seat, dusts himself off and adjusts his mask. He then brusquely walks to the edge of the stage until he’s in front of Patrick.)

PATRICK: Are…are you gonna do something?

MR. BUSHIDO: Of course. I shall lend my strong left arm to that young man’s cause.

SUMERAGI: Wait, so you’re going to help Setsuna?

MR. BUSHIDO: For the moment. Now, enough chatter. To battle!

(Mr. Bushido dramatically points to the sky with an overblown flourish. Everyone looks up at where’s he’s pointing. While everyone is looking up, Mr. Bushido runs in the opposite direction, out of the auditorium. Up in the sky, the battle continues to rage. Setsuna has obviously reestablished control of the 00-Raiser and dodges a number of Fangs whirling around it and several beam blasts. The Gadessa tracks the Gundam’s frantic movement with its GN Mega Launcher. Inside the cockpit, Revive calmly waits for a clear shot.)

REVIVE: One Mississippi…two Mississippi…

(Finally, the 00-Raiser is forced to block as the Reborns Gundam smashes into it from the side, sending it spiraling away uncontrollably.)

REVIVE: (Smiles) I have you.

(The Gadessa prepares to fire its blast when suddenly…)

MR. BUSHIDO: (Off-screen, screams) I APOLOGIZE FOR THIS SNEAK ATTACK!!!

(The Gadessa is suddenly smashed into from behind by another mobile suit. Revive manages to right himself and turns to regard the newcomer. Likewise, the Reborns and 00-Raiser stop fighting and look over. The Regnant hovers down behind them as well.)

RIBBONS: (Annoyed) You?

HILING: (Confused) Him?

MR. BUSHIDO: (Smirks) Me!

(We see that Mr. Bushido is piloting yet another variant of the MASURAO, this one decked-out in colors approximating the Gundam EXIA. In addition, it has two American flags sticking up from behind its shoulders, waving proudly in the wind.)

REVIVE: (Eyes narrow) You cannot be serious.

MR. BUSHIDO: (Smugly) This is the Masurao-custom Susanowo-custom…the HATABEIKOKU*!!!

*Mr. Bushido hopes this translates to “American Flag”.

See the Hatabeikoku.

(In the 00-Raiser’s cockpit, Setsuna also appears confused.)

SETSUNA: (To Mr. Bushido) You? You helped me?

MR. BUSHIDO: I am only aiding you now so I can defeat you later, boy. Understand?

SETSUNA: Understood.

MR. BUSHIDO: (Smirks) So it shall be! Arch-enemies working together for the same goal! Is there anything more romantic?

SETSUNA: Uh…

RIBBONS: (Still annoyed) I can assure you, if that boy has an arch-enemy, it’s me.

SAJI: (Meekly speaks up) Wait, uh…what about the mercenary guy?

MR. BUSHIDO: (Muses) Yes, I suppose he too could be considered the boy’s arch-enemy.

LOUISE: (Speaks up, peeved) Look, he’s got a lot of arch-enemies, can we get back to fighting?

REVIVE: Agreed.

(The Gadessa swings its GN Mega Launcher forward and fires a blast at the Hatabeikoku. Mr. Bushido easily dodges and draws twin GN Swords. The Reborns converts to Cannon mode and begins bombarding the 00-Raiser again, and is joined by bendy blasts from Hiling’s Regnant. Back on the ground, Marina steps forward on the stage, looking worried but also determined.)

MARINA: (Looks around) Everyone, let’s please gather up our good wishes and hopes. I’ll sing a song to focus them toward Setsuna and the others who are fighting so very hard right now.

(Everyone watches as Marina clears her throat and begins to open her mouth. Suddenly, Lacus jumps up on the stage alongside her.)

LACUS: (Smirks) How cute. Now stand aside and I’ll show how this is done.

MARINA: (Smiles kindly) Oh, do you want to help? I could use a backup singer.

LACUS: (Eyes narrow) Back…up? BACKUP??? You- !

(Marina doesn’t hear the rest of Lacus’ outburst, because she starts singing her song. You know the one.)

LACUS: HEY! Stop that! I’m the one who’ll-

(Lacus is interrupted by a chorus of children’s voices, which come out of nowhere to back Marina up. Lacus looks around in bewilderment.)

LACUS: What?? Where is that coming from?? Stop it! STOP SINGING!

(The song goes on as Lacus grabs Marina by the shoulders and begins shaking her violently. Marina still manages to sing perfectly, her eyes closed.)

LACUS: This is MY thing, you don’t- !

(Suddenly, Lacus is repelled by some apparently invisible force field that encases Marina, powered by the hopeful wishes of children. Lacus slaps futilely at Marina, but can’t seem to touch her.)

LACUS: (Screaming) Cities will burn for this! Whole cities!

(As Marina continues to sing softly and sweetly as the battle rages above, Shinn leaps up from his seat, fists clenched.)

SHINN: That’s it! I’m going up there!

LUNA: (Worried) Oh no, Shinn, no.

SHINN: Sorry, Luna, but I can’t stand around and not interfere!

LUNA: (Sighs) You realize this is massive hypocrisy on your part?

SHINN: Wha- ?

LUNA: You’re always going on about how Kira and Athrun butt into things they have no business butting into!

SHINN: (Loudly) THAT’S COMPLETELY DIFFERENT! They’re stupid jerks!

ATHRUN: (Speaks up from off-screen) We’re sitting right next to you, Shinn.

SHINN: (Waves politely at Athrun) Stupid. (Waves politely at Kira) Jerk.

LUNA: Shinn…

SHINN: Sorry, Luna! The cast is die!

(Shinn runs off-screen, out of the auditorium. Luna and the rest watch him go.)

ATHRUN: Hm. Shinn was almost accidentally clever there.

LUNA: (Shakes her head) It happens. I’m just thankful he had the presence of mind to go outside before summoning his mobile suit this time.

(Athrun turns back and looks thoughtful.)

ATHRUN: But maybe he has the right idea…this could get out of hand.

KIRA: (Nods) Yeah.

ATHRUN: Do you think we should butt-in this time?

(Kira turns, gives Athrun an odd look and extends his hand.)

KIRA: Hi, I’m Kira Yamato, have we met?

ATHRUN: (Annoyed) Don’t be an ass.

KIRA: (Starts to get up) Yeah, let’s go do this.

(As soon as Kira stands, his collar goes off and shocks him into submission.)

KIRA: (Falls back down) ACK!

(Lacus walks up, still looking annoyed at Marina’s singing. She removes her finger from the shock-trigger, looking stern.)

LACUS: Absolutely not.

KIRA: (Pained) W-what? Why?

LACUS: I don’t care about Shinn, but I won’t have you two fighting.

ATHRUN: WHAT? You make us fight people all the time!

LACUS: (Shrugs) Only to impose my will.

ATHRUN: Argh, well, we have to do SOMETHING!

LACUS: (Folds her arms) No.

(Athrun looks helplessly at Kira, who just nods at him.)

KIRA: Don’t worry. Maybe WE can’t get directly involved personally…but I can still help out.

(Kira looks on-stage, where Allelujah and Marie still stand, watching the battle. He squints his eyes at them and strains.)

KIRA: (Concentrating) C’mon, c’mon…

(Suddenly, a Newtype flash splits the air in front of Kira. Simultaneously on-stage, Allelujah grabs his head and doubles over with a cry of pain. Marie also touches her head and appears uneasy. Kira stops straining and sighs in relief.)

KIRA: There we go. Thought I’d lost it.

(On-stage, Allelujah straightens back up slowly, an evil grin plastered on his face. And Marie looks around with wary eyes at her surroundings.)

HALLELUJAH: (Amused) Hm, seems someone kicked in my door.

SOMA: What the hell just happened?

(Hallelujah turns to regard Soma, his eyes wide and his grin growing wider.)

HALLELUJAH: Soma Peires! It’s been too long!

SOMA: (Eyes narrow) Oh, you’re the other one now, eh?

HALLELUJAH: I wanted another chance to kill you, and now its been handed to me!

(Soma immediately draws a gun from behind her back and points it at Hal. He just smirks more.)

SOMA: I wouldn’t mind eliminating you either.

(Sumeragi steps in-between them.)

SUMERAGI: Uh, suggestion? Why don’t you guys exercise your murderous tendencies towards our enemies up there? There’ll be plenty of time to kill each other afterward, I’m sure…

(Hallelujah fixes on Sumeragi with a predatory grin.)

HALLELUJAH: (Cackles) You always make so much sense. That’s why they pay you the big boobs, lady.

SUMERAGI: (Annoyed) Simmer down.

SOMA: (Nods) We’ll engage then.

(Hallelujah just laughs manically and he and Soma run off stage. Back up at the battle, the Cherudim and the Gaddess clash against each other. The Gaddess pushes off and unleashes its Fangs, which swarm around Cherudim, nipping chips of armor off the Gundam. In its cockpit, Lyle grits his teeth in annoyance as he tries to dodge.)

LYLE: That is IT! I have HAD it with these motherZOINKin’ Fangs on this motherZOINKin’ suit!

(The Cherudim activates Trans-Am, and easily breaks away from the Fang swarm. The remote weapons are unable to catch up with him.)

LYLE: Haro! Shield and Rifle Bits! Light those suckers up!

HARO: Roger! Roger!

(All of Cherudim’s remote weapons detach and target the Gaddess’ Fangs. Lyle aims the GN Sniper Rifle and everything fires at once. All of Anew’s Fangs are destroyed in a single barrage. Within the Gaddess, Anew simply looks grim. The Gaddess flies directly at the Cherudim with its GN Sword brandished, but the Trans-Am-activated Gundam switches to its GN Pistols and easily parries all the blows.)

ANEW: (Grits her teeth) Lyle…

LYLE: It’s OVER, Anew!

(The Cherudim disarms the Gaddess with a flurry of Trans-Am-assisted pistol blows and then shoots its arms off. Lyle finally takes aim at the Gaddess’ main body as Cherudim fades out of Trans-Am. Within the Innovade suit’s cockpit, Anew closes her eyes, accepting her fate.)

ANEW: Make…make it fast, Lyle.

LYLE: (Determined) If you insist.

(The Cherudim simply tosses its pistols aside and extends an open palm to the Gaddess.)

LYLE: (Smiles warmly) Come back, Anew.

(Anew’s eyes cloud over with tears as she regards Cherudim’s inviting hand.)

ANEW: L-Lyle…

LYLE: No matter what you’ve done, you’ll always have a place with me.

ANEW: (Happily) Lyle!

(Anew starts to get up out of her seat, when suddenly…)

SHINN: (Screams from off-screen) DAAAIGGGGGH!!!

ANEW: H-huh?

(The DESTINY GUNDAM suddenly blazes in at a great speed, blows the Cherudim aside and unceremoniously impales the Gaddess in the cockpit, mortally wounding Anew.)

LYLE: (Screams) NO!

ANEW: (Dying) L-Lyle…ack-

(The Gaddess explodes into pieces as the Destiny yanks its ASSword out. Lyle cries out in grief.)

LYLE: (Anguished) ANEEEEEEW!!!

SHINN: (Smiling broadly) There ya go! I handled it!

(Cherudim suddenly flies over to Destiny. Lyle’s suit grabs Shinn’s suit by the throat with one hand and starts repeatedly punching it in the face with the other.)

LYLE: (Screaming tearfully between punches) YOU! KILLED! ANEW! SHE WAS GOING TO COME BACK THIS TIME! SHE WAS! YOU KILLED HER! AIIAAAAAGGGGH!!!

(In Destiny’s rattling cockpit, Shinn still bears a wide grin.)

SHINN: (Excited) Wow! I’m being beaten up by Lockon Stratos! This is awesome!

(Nearby in the Reborns Gundam, Ribbons takes notice of the Gaddess being destroyed and grimaces, then touches a button in his cockpit.)

RIBBONS: (Annoyed) I didn’t want to have to do this, but it’s time to call in the meat cavalry.

(A moment later, the skies become dark as hundreds of GAGA suits begin arriving. The ARCHER ARIOS also arrives on the scene, with Hallelujah and Soma piloting their respective suits. Hallelujah grins at seeing the Gagas.)

HALLELUJAH: Ah, a near-endless amount of warm bodies for me to carve into. Those Innovade twerps are too kind.

SOMA: Wide bursts of fire. Destroy as many as possible while they’re still close together.

HALLELUJAH: Don’t give me orders, woman.

SOMA: Shut up and do your part or I’ll shoot you down myself!

HALLELUJAH: (Grins) Ooh, hurt me, bitch.

(The Arios Gundam and the GN Archer split up and begin engaging the Gaga forces, firing flurries of missiles and destroying dozens of the Innovade troops at once. Meanwhile, the Hatabeikoku swings its twin swords at the Gadessa, destroying its GN Mega Launcher. Revive grits his teeth and draws a beam saber.)

MR. BUSHIDO: (Excited) Yes, that’s it! We’ll duel to our heart’s content! Our long, glistening swords meeting each other in the pale light again and again and again!

REVIVE: (Creeped-out) Stay the hell away from me, you fricking perv!

(Nearby, the 00-Raiser and the Reborns clash against each other again. The Reborns kicks off the 00-Raiser as the Regnant suddenly comes up from behind the Gundam.)

SAJI: Ah! Setsuna, behind!

LOUISE: (Rolls eyes) He already knows that, Saji.

(Setsuna isn’t quick enough, and the Regnant gets the 00-Raiser in a bear-hug from behind.)

SETSUNA: Damn…

HILING: (Grins) Fast as fast can be, you can’t get away from myself! Ribbons, go for it!

RIBBONS: (Scoffs) I’ll take advantage of this, but just remember I didn’t need your help.

HILING: (Winks) ‘Course.

(The Reborns flies directly at the entrapped 00-Raiser with its beam saber drawn.)

RIBBONS: (Smirks) This is your end, Setsuna F. Seiei, Louise Halevy, and etcetera!

SAJI: (Frowns) Thanks.

(As the Reborns approaches, Setsuna grits his teeth and his eyes begin to glow orange.)

SETSUNA: (Innovating) I-I won’t let you- !

(At the last moment, the 00-Raiser undergoes quantization and phases through the Regnant’s grip like a wraith.)

HILING: (Stunned) Wha- ?

(The Reborns accidentally slashes a deep wound into the Regnant’s chest with its beam saber. Hiling screams as there are a few explosions in her cockpit.)

HILING: (Pained) AGH! RIB-BOOOOOONS!

RIBBONS: (Annoyed) That was your fault! You let him get away!

HILING: (Mad) I didn’t….! (Blinks in confusion) Uh…

(Ribbons quickly spins his suit around to see the 00-Raiser materialize behind him in Trans-Am, with its GN Sword III in rifle mode brought to bear. The 0-Raiser’s wing binders also swing up and its missile docks open. In the 0-Raiser’s cockpit, Louise narrows her eyes and smiles.)

LOUISE: Eat it, flat-chest.

(The 00-Raiser fires all its weapons. The Reborns easily flies up and over the barrage, but the Regnant is struck by a powerful blast and a swarm of GN missiles that cause critical damage to it.)

HILING: (Desperately) R-Ribbons, save m- !

(The Regnant succumbs to its wounds and explodes violently. In the Reborns’ cockpit, Ribbons frowns as he watches his twin’s suit go down in flames.)

RIBBONS: Well, that’s what you get for sucking.

(Ribbons turns his attention back to the Trans-Am 00-Raiser. He smirks and activates Reborns’ Trans-Am, then blazes directly at Setsuna.)

RIBBONS: I’m not impressed by your hyped-up Doozy-Bot!

(Setsuna’s glowing Innovator eyes widen and he grits his teeth.)

SETSUNA: Doozy-Bot?? DOOZY-BOT???

SAJI: Uh-oh.

LOUISE: (Smiles) You just leaped over the line, ZOINK-face.

SETSUNA: (Enraged) RAAAAAAGHHHHH!!!

(The Reborns’ forward charge is suddenly violently halted as multicolored GN Particles erupt from the 00-Raiser’s frame. Ribbons struggles to right himself, but the Reborns spirals out of control as it is buffeted by the brilliant light streaming from Setsuna’ Gundam. In the 00’s cockpit, we see that Setsuna’s monitor reads “Trans-Am Burst Activated”.)

SETSUNA: (Screams) THIS IS NO DOOZY-BOT! THIS. IS. GUNDAM!

(The torrent of GN particles flowing from the 00-Raiser shoot everywhere, blanketing the entire area. Everyone in the vicinity is doused in the particles, each experiencing a different effect. Nearby, Regene Regetta grins from the Seravee’s cockpit as GN particles fill the air. The Garazzo and the Empruss halt in midair, as their pilots are overwhelmed.)

BRING: (Straining) Gkk! What???

DEVINE: (Gasping) Our, our quantum brainwaves are-

REGENE: (Smiles) Yeah. Also, I cut you off from Veda’s support. I’m a stinker.

BRING: (Snarls) You…bastard!

(The Garazzo lurches over to the Seravee and swings a beam-fingered arm at it.)

REGENE: (Still smiling) Still kicking, eh? We’ll just have to remedy that, eh Ti-errrrr-ria?

(The Garazzo’s slash comes down at the Seravee, only for the Gundam to twist to the side and separate from its backpack. The slash passes between the two Gundam parts as Bring looks confused.)

BRING: Wha-?

(The Seravee’s backpack transforms into the SERAPHIM GUNDAM and flies towards the unsteady Empruss. Bring watches it fly away in confusion.)

BRING: What are you- ?

TIERIA: (Disembodied voice) Just a little divide and conquer.

(The Garazzo turns back around just as the Seravee’s fist solidly connects with its head, shattering the Innovade suit’s visor. Bring growls and rights itself as he regards the Seravee’s main body. We briefly see a ghostly image of Tieria made up of GN particles superimposed over Seravee. The Gundam fires up its four remaining arms with beam sabers and then rotates them into an attack position.)

TIERIA: (A hint of amusement in his voice) Attack, Stabity.

(The Garazzo falters for a moment, then flies directly at Seravee. Meanwhile, the Seraphim nimbly zips over and behind the Empruss. In its cockpit, Regene still wears a mischievous smile.)

REGENE: I suppose this is kinda unfair, what with me being protected from this particle storm by Veda, but I really can’t complain.

DEVINE: (Pained) Die!

(The Empruss spins around and fires a massive blast, but the Seraphim easily darts around it.)

REGENE: You, however, can complain all you want. I won’t mind. You are totally getting beaten like a redheaded stepchild, after all.

(The Empruss raises its claws and fires off its taser-whips, but Seraphim deploys beam sabers and cuts through them in mid-flight. It flies right in front of the Empruss and stabs both beam sabers into the mobile armor’s claws, disabling them. The Seraphim lets go of the saber handles and converts its arms into GN Beam Cannons, pointing them both at the Empruss’ center.)

DEVINE: (Eyes widen) Wai-

REGENE: (Smirks) BAI-BAI!

(The Seraphim fires, shearing the Empruss in half. The mobile armor crumbles and explodes. Close by, the Gadessa and the Hatabeikoku clash blades, with GN Particles surging around them. In his cockpit, Revive is clearly feeling the disruptive effects of the particle storm, but is still managing to focus on the fight. Mr. Bushido, however, seems somewhat distant.)

MR. BUSHIDO: (Murmurs) This phenomena, what is…

REVIVE: (Grits teeth) You won’t beat me with these tricks!

(The Gadessa breaks the blade clash and kicks the Hatabeikoku, stunning Mr. Bushido briefly. The Innovade suit raises its beam saber for the kill, when it is suddenly struck by a series of light beam blasts from above. Annoyed, Revive looks up to regard his new attackers.)

REVIVE: Who the- ?

DARYL: (Screams from off-screen) YOU DAAAH-IEEEEE!!!

(Another series of beam blasts hit the Gadessa, destroying its beam saber-wielding arm. It drops back, trying to evade as two customized GN FLAGS descend from the sky above it, firing. They are piloted by HOWARD MASON (!) and DARYL DODGE.)

HOWARD: (Shouts) CAPTAIN!!!

(Mr. Bushido’s eyes widen in shock as he beholds the newcomers that have apparently materialized from a cloud of GN particles.)

MR. BUSHIDO: (Disbelieving) HOW-ARD MAY-SON!!! Daryl! You’ve come back to life!

HOWARD: No, captain! We’re actually just GN Ghosts!

MR. BUSHIDO: GN Gho- …does that even make sense?

HOWARD: All thanks to the power of that boy’s Trans-Am Burst! We’ve manifested to aid you in your battle and also remind you of who you really are!

(Within the cockpit, Mr. Bushido shivers and retracts his helmet’s visor. He then rips the bushido mask from his face, revealing he is actually GRAHAM AKER! WHOA! Tears begin to stream down his scarred visage.)

GRAHAM: You’re right. I’m not Mr. Bushido. I’m Graham Aker, ace of the Union! And now I’m going restore my lost pride alongside my Flag Fighter brothers!

HOWARD: That’s the spirit, Captain!

GRAHAM: (Determined) Let’s do this!

DARYL: (Screams) LEEEEE-ROOOOOY…JEN-KINS!

(The Hatabeikoku and the two GN Flags tear after the damaged Gadessa, pelting it with fire. In its cockpit, Revive desperately radios for help.)

REVIVE: RIBBONS! This situation is deteriorating! We can’t- !

(The Reborns Gundam is clashing repeatedly with the 00-Raiser, which is still spewing multicolored GN Particles everywhere. Despite both suits being in Trans-Am, the Reborns is clearly being overwhelmed.)

RIBBONS: (Screams) NO! We don’t lose this! Not again! Not to stinking humans!

(Ribbons’ eyes glow brilliantly for a moment as he issues a mental command through his quantum brainwaves.)

RIBBONS: All Gaga forces, kill everyone on the ground! EVERYONE!

(The remaining Gaga forces in the area all suddenly begin flying at the ground at top speed, heading back towards the auditorium. Dozens are shot down as the Arios and GN-Archer move to intercept.)

ALLELUJAH: (Desperately) Protect everyone that is dear to us!

HALLELUJAH: (Snarls) I’m the only one that’s dear to me!

SOMA: (Determined) We won’t let a single one through!

MARIE: (Also determined, but less uppity about it) This is a battle to save lives!

(Several Gagas make it through the initial barrage, but they are quickly destroyed as well as the Cherudim swoops down to help out, furiously firing with a GN Beam Pistol in one hand and its GN Beam Submachine Gun in the other.)

LYLE: (Screaming) RAAAAAAAAAGH!!!

(Another handful of Gagas are rent asunder before they can reach the ground as the Destiny blazes by and swings its ASSword through them. In its cockpit, Shinn wears a wild grin.)

SHINN: I’m helping! I’m totally helping Celestial Being!

(Shinn looks up to see another mass of Gagas flying down towards him and suddenly pauses in confusion as he begins to hear a beat beginning to build in his cockpit.)

SHINN: Huh?

(The “Under Cover” remix of the song “ZIPS” by T.M. Revolution begins to play in the background. Shinn’s eyes grow wide as GN Particles flutter around in his cockpit. He lets out a joyful cry.)

SHINN: (Tearfully) MY OWN SONG! FINALLY!

(Down on the ground in the auditorium, Luna frowns and shouts up to Shinn.)

LUNA: No, Shinn! That’s just a remix of a song Kira already used in the first Seed Special Edition.

SHINN: I CAN’T HEAR YOU THIS IS MY SONG AND I WILL ROCK IT!

(The Destiny blazes upward and begins hacking through another swarm of Gagas with gusto. Back on the ground, Luna just sighs.)

LUNA: Oh well. As long as he’s happy.

(Luna looks over at Athrun as GN Particles swirl around everyone.)

LUNA: You okay?

ATHRUN: (Nods) Yeah, I seem to be fine, other than a sudden need to never switch sides again…something’s definitely up with Kira and Lacus though.

(Athrun and Luna look over at Kira and Lacus, who are holding each other and gazing deeply into each other’s eyes as if no one else in the universe exists except for them.)

LACUS: (Lovingly) Kira, can you ever forgive me for being so mean?

KIRA: (Lovingly) Lacus, you are the moon and the stars and the sun and the sky.

LACUS: (Melodramatically) Oh Kira!

KIRA: (Melodramatically) Oh Lacus!

(The two embrace, clinging to each other adoringly and remain like that. Athrun and Luna both raise an eyebrow.)

ATHRUN: Something is horribly, horribly wrong here.

LUNA: Uh…yeah, a lot of the people on-stage are feeling it too.

(Athrun turns to regard the 00 cast on the stage. The GN particle storm is having an effect on some of them. Ian looks around in confusion, waving his hand through a cloud of GN particles, then looks back up at the battle.)

IAN: (Shakes fist up at sky) Science does not WORK this way, Setsuna!!!

(Ian turns to Sumeragi, who has a pleasant look on her face and is slightly swaying back and forth. Ian taps her on the shoulder.)

IAN: Uh, hello?

SUMERAGI: (Hiccups) Huh? Wha?

IAN: Are you…okay?

SUMERAGI: (Sluggishly) Never…huk…better.

IAN: Oh my lord, you’re getting buzzed off this, aren’t you??

SUMERAGI: (Hiccups again) No I’m nah.

IAN: (Shakes his head) The GN particles must be reacting with the alcohol already in your bloodstream.

SUMERAGI: (Smiles) That is awesome.

(Sumeragi turns and lightly hits Billy on the shoulder.)

SUMERAGI: Isn’t this awwwwwe-some, Willy? Reh-minds meh of our university days…

(Billy just turns and regards Sumeragi in a somewhat peculiar manner.)

BILLY: (Goofy grin) Yeh-HEH!

SUMERAGI: (Giggles) You always were such a lightweight, you!

(Ian just shakes his head and looks over to Lasse, who is still watching the battle above impassively.)

IAN: And what about you? Are you being affected by this?

LASSE: (Shakes his head) Nah, I can’t possibly get more awesome.

(Mileina pops out on the other side of Lasse, her eyes freakishly large and shiny.)

MILEINA: OMGTHESESPARKLESARESOPRETTYANDSTUFFISSOBRIGHTLYCOLOREDNOW!!!

IAN: Uh…sweetie?

(Mileina runs a few circle around Lasse, who doesn’t pay her any attention and runs over to Feldt, who is also intently watching the battle above. Mileina grabs onto Feldt’s arm and tugs at it repeatedly.)

MILEINA: OMGI’MSOGLADI’MHEREAREN’TYOUGLADYOU’REHEREFELDT OMGYOUAREMYBESTESTFRIENDANDOMGTHISISTHEGREATESTDON’TYOUTHINKSOFELDT???

FELDT: (Deadpan) Mileina. Shut the ZOINK up.

(Ali staggers around the stage, frantically clawing at his clothes and trying to futilely swipe GN particles out of the air.)

ALI: (Unnerved) Get them off, get them OFF! They’re so fluffy and clean and soothing and full of good will. I can’t take it, I can’t TAKE IT! AAAAAAUGH!!!

(Ali collapses in a fetal position, writhing in pain. Neil walks up to him, hands in pockets and looking amused.)

NEIL: (Smirking) D’awww, this must be rough for you. Don’t worry, the princess is coming over to make it all better.

(Marina walks over, still singing softly, kneels down and puts a comforting hand on Ali’s shoulder. He immediately shoves his hands over his ears.)

ALI: (Pained) AGGGGGHHHH! Make it stop, I’ll find religion, I’ll try to not kill quite so many people anymore!

PATRICK: (Screams from off-screen) OU-SHAAAAA! That’s IT!

(Everyone looks over at Patrick, at the fore of the stage, who is pointing up at the battle. GN particles gather and swirl around him.)

PATRICK: (Hot-bloodedly) I’m mad as hell and I’m not gonna take it anymore! I’m going up there!

(Patrick whirls and looks at the remaining cast members behind him with a determined expression.)

PATRICK: WHO’S WITH ME???

(No one moves at first, then Neil sympathetically steps forward and shrugs.)

NEIL: (Speaks up) I’d love to. But like I said before…rules say I can’t.

PATRICK: Aw, too bad! If we combined our forces, we could be Neil Patrick Harris!

NEIL: I’m…gonna imagine that makes sense to someone somewhere.

(Ali screams over Marina’s singing from his twitching position on the floor.)

ALI: You can take my suit! NGH! Just…just get this to end!

(Patrick points at Ali’s crumpled form intently, grinning.)

PATRICK: Thanks, fellow ace!

(Ali spastically digs into his coat pocket and tosses a set of keys at Patrick from the floor. Patrick catches them, bounds off stage and runs out of the auditorium, passing by Kira and Lacus, who watch him go.)

LACUS: (Worried) Will he be able to stop this awful fighting, Kira?

KIRA: (Comfortingly) We just need to have to have the courage…to believe in hope.

LACUS: (Melodramatically) Oh Kira!

KIRA: (Melodramatically) Oh Lacus!

(The two embrace once again as Athrun and Luna watch with disturbed looks. Up in the sky, the battle still rages, but the Gaga forces have been reduced to merely a fraction of what they were. The 00-Raiser is still streaming GN particles from all over its frame as it chases the Reborns Gundam around. In the 0-Raiser’s cockpit, Louise grins as Setsuna smashes into Ribbons’s suit and sends it for a loop.)

LOUISE: This is the best! We’re winning, we’re totally beating him!

(Louise turns back to look at Saji, who has a sullen look on his face as GN particles float around in the cockpit.)

LOUISE: (Sighs and rolls her eyes) You know, the least you could do was smile, Saji!

SAJI: (Yawns) Damn, woman. Why y’always gotta be such a bear-trap on m’balls?

LOUISE: (Pauses, confused) Pardon?

SAJI: (Mockingly) “Pardon? I can hear you Saji over the sound of my stupid whiny bitch voice”.

LOUISE: S-Saji…you’ve never spoken to me in this way… (Suddenly grins) I LIKE IT.

SAJI: (Shrugs) Bitches don’t know ‘bout my backbone.

(Nearby, the Garazzo flies around with no arms or legs, trying to escape from the Seravee, which is still wielding four beam sabers. In his cockpit, Bring looks agitated. Suddenly, the Seraphim drops down in front of the Garazzo, aiming its beam cannon arms.)

REGENE: (Grins) Any last words, Buuuuur-ing?

(Bring just grits his teeth and the Garazzo’s escape pod breaks off from its main body, flying straight up.)

REGENE: (Shakes head) Right then. Forgot we don’t talk on Planet You.

(Without an ounce of hesitation, Regene aims upward and blows Bring’s escape pod up with a single shot. The Seraphim then moves and recombines with the Seravee.)

TIERIA: (Disembodied voice) Was that really necessary?

REGENE: (Smiles) Aw, don’t be cross, my double from an adjacent bubble.

(Nearby, Howard and Daryl’s GN Flags hold the damaged Gadessa by each of its arms as the Hatabeikoku floats some distance away.)

GRAHAM: Hold it steady, boys! This is gonna be EPIC.

(The Hatabeikoku flies directly at the captive Gadessa at top speed. In his cockpit, Revive’s eyes widen.)

REVIVE: You humans are insane! Insane!

GRAHAM: (Grins) Always wanted to try this…

(The Gadessa’s escape pod breaks off and begins to fly away, as the Hatabeikoku swings forward with its leg.)

GRAHAM: GRAHAM KICK!

(The two GN Flags let go just as Graham makes contact, kicking the Gadessa’s main body toward its fleeing escape pod. The Gadessa’s main body smashes into Revive’s escape pod, sending them both towards the ground.)

REVIVE: AGH!!!

(The Gadessa smashes into the ground, crushing the escape pod under it. Then both of them explode. Above, the two GN Flags and the Hatabeikoku exchange high-fives and fist-bumps.)

GRAHAM: Yeah!

HOWARD: WOO!

DARYL: (Screams) YOON-YUN FUH-LAG FIGH-TAAAAAAHS!!!

GRAHAM: (Smiles) Thanks, you guys. (Pauses, suddenly surprised) Hey! What’s happening??

(The two GN Flags begin dissolving into thin air. The Hatabeikoku reaches out desperately to them.)

HOWARD: Sorry, Captain, but we have to go now.

GRAHAM: But…

HOWARD: (Smiles) We’ve helped you regain your pride. Never forget it again.

GRAHAM: (Nods) Thank you, men.

(The GN Flags have almost completely faded out of existence, when Daryl’s suit points at the Hatabeikoku.)

DARYL: (Screams) YOU LIIIIII-VE!!!

(Graham just watches them fade away completely with a sad, but prideful smile. Meanwhile, the 00-Raiser and the Reborns clash yet again, and the 00-Raiser fades out of Trans-Am Burst.)

RIBBONS: (Snarls) FINALLY!

(The Reborns shoves the 00-Raiser away and converts to Cannon mode, targeting Setsuna with all its weapons. But the 00-Raiser suddenly halts and holds its hand up.)

RIBBONS: (Annoyed) What?

SETSUNA: (Calmly) Surrender, Ribbons Almark.

RIBBONS: (Infuriated) WHAT?

LOUISE: (Speaks up) Yeah, you’re just-

SAJI: (Interrupts) You’re ZOINKing done, snotball.

(In the 0-Raiser’s cockpit, Louise looks back at Saji with wide eyes, Saji just regards her with annoyance.)

SAJI: What?

LOUISE: (Trembling) Get your suit off. Take me right now, in this cockpit.

SAJI: (Rolls eyes) Psh. Whatever.

(We cut back to outside, where the Reborns Cannon angrily gestures at the 00-Raiser.)

RIBBONS: How dare you! My Gaga forces will-

REGENE: (Off-screen) Do nothing.

(The Reborns Cannon converts straight back to Gundam mode so it is facing the opposite direction. Ribbons’ eyes widen as he takes in the sight. All the Gagas have been destroyed, and he is now facing the Seravee, Arios, Cherudim, and the GN Archer, all aiming weapons at him.)

REGENE: (Smirking) We win.

LYLE: (Darkly) You’re going to PAY for what you’ve done.

ALLELUJAH: You’re not getting away this time.

SOMA: Stand. DOWN.

MARIE: Please.

HALLELUJAH: (Irritated) Oh COME ON, we’re not really doing this, are we?

(The Arios fires on the Reborns. Ribbons quickly dodges and flies his suit up and over everyone.)

RIBBONS: This…this is just a setback! I’ll retreat for now and come back when I-

PATRICK: (Off-screen) NOT SO FAST!

(The ARCHE GUNDAM pulls up into the Reborns’ flight path, with Patrick at the controls.)

RIBBONS: (Confused) What the-?

PATRICK: “Barely-trained chimp”, am I?? Take this! COLASOUR-MANNEQUIN FANGS!

(The Arche Gundam does a bizarre pirouette in midair and unleashes its Fangs with a flamboyant gesture. The Reborns desperately corrects its flight path, spiraling out of the way of the Fang swarm.)

RIBBONS: Ngh!

(The Arche Gundam intercepts and hits the Reborns with its GN Buster Sword, back in the direction of the others. As the Innovade suit tumbles back through the air, the 00-Raiser comes up from behind it, GN Sword III extended and pointed forward.)

SETSUNA: (Intently) Setsuna F. Seiei, removing the distortion!

SAJI: (Faintly in the background) Saji Crossroad, rounding the bases.

LOUISE: (Faintly) Tee-hee!

(Just as the 00-Raiser is about to impale the Reborns Gundam, the Destiny comes out of nowhere from another angle, with its ASSword pointed forward in Shinn’s signature attack.)

SHINN: (Shouts) LOOKIT ME, I’M HELPING!

SETSUNA: Wha- ?

(The 00-Raiser is forced to hit the brakes as it narrowly misses the Destiny on the way to the floundering Reborns.)

SHINN: (Looks back) Huh?

(In the split-second of confusion, Ribbons manages to right his suit and avoid the Destiny’s charge.)

RIBBONS: Yah-HAH! Ribbons Almark- AWAY!

(Ribbons quickly turns his suit around and retreats, with both Setsuna and Shinn too off-balance to stop him. The Reborns is in the distance when they finally get their bearings. The rest of the mobile suits in the area converge on them.)

PATRICK: What happened??

LYLE: (Growls) The kid with the personality disorder let him get away!

SHINN: Hey, I don’t have a personality disorder! I’m just antisocial!

REGENE: It doesn’t matter. He’ll be back. His ego won’t allow him to leave it at this.

ALLELUJAH: Not-Tieria’s right. We’ll get another opportunity.

HALLELUJAH: Agh, what a bunch of pussies. I’m going back to sleep.

PATRICK: Let’s get back to the ground for now.

(The suits all begin to descend, except for the 00-Raiser. Setsuna keeps staring in the direction that Ribbons retreated in for another couple seconds, then turns his Gundam away and down.)

SETSUNA: Saji Crossroad, Louise Halevy? Are you alright? It’s finished.

SAJI: (On intercom) Oh no it isn’t.

LOUISE: (On intercom) Oh Saji, you insatiable beast!

(Setsuna just makes a confused face as we watch the 00-Raiser gently land. Some moments later, everyone (save Saji and Louise) has gathered back on the stage. Lyle’s sitting in a chair, looking depressed as Neil and Patrick stand over him, apparently trying to comfort him. Everyone else kinda hangs out and chats with each other. Feldt shyly moves over to Setsuna, holding a flower in a glass case.)

FELDT: Uh, Setsuna? Linda bred this new flower just recently, and…and I want you to have this one too.

(Setsuna accepts it, with a nod and a hint of a smile.)

SETSUNA: Thank you, Feldt, I-

SHINN: (Off-screen) YAAAAGH!

(Shinn suddenly runs up and kicks the flower out of Setsuna’s hand. The glass case flies off and smashes on the ground. Shinn then runs over and steps on it several times.)

SHINN: Phew, that was a close one. Another flower destroyed by yours truly!

(Feldt looks sad. Setsuna walks over to Shinn with a scowl on his face.)

SETSUNA: (Annoyed) You’ve upset Feldt Grace.

SHINN: (Shrugs) Ah, just kill her sister. She’ll be all over you.

(Setsuna gives Shinn a odd look, then turns away to walk back to Feldt. Luna pops up beside Shinn.)

LUNA: Huh, that was distinctly unlike hero worship. What’s up?

SHINN: I learned a valuable lesson today. I-I understand now…these guys aren’t some celebrities that I can harass or idols I can look up to. They’re just Gundam characters. Like me. Like all of us.

LUNA: Terrific. Good on you. Can we go now?

SHINN: Sure.

(Shinn and Luna walk off-stage, to the floor where Athrun, Kira, and Lacus are waiting. Kira and Lacus are still clinging to each other tightly.)

KIRA: Friends! Let us return to that place…that place where there is peace and all our friends are!

ATHRUN: (Confused) Uh, you mean Murrue’s house?

LACUS: I just hope those other nice people find the peace of heart and mind that we’ve discovered!

KIRA: (Melodramatically) Oh Lacus!

LACUS: (Melodramatically) Oh Kira!

(The two dramatically embrace again. Athrun, Shinn, and Luna just watch, dumbfounded. Luna whispers over to Athrun.)

LUNA: What’s the deal? Why are they still like this?

ATHRUN: I don’t know and I don’t care. Besides, they seem to be happy. I say, let ‘em stay as they are.

SHINN: Feh, now it’s gonna be a boring wait until the 00 movie actually gets released.

ATHRUN: Well, at least there’s Gundam Unicorn.

LUNA: (Quickly) Athrun, no!

(Shinn snaps his head over to look at Athrun with stunned eyes.)

SHINN: (Dubiously) Gundam What-kinda-corn?

LUNA: Crap.

SHINN: (Wildly) Another new series I didn’t know about??? Holy crap, I gotta get to an internet!!!

(Shinn runs at full-speed out of the auditorium, leaving the others behind. Luna and Athrun both stare after him for a moment, then Luna turns and punches Athrun’s arm really hard.)

ATHRUN: (Rubs arm) Ow.

LUNA: (Annoyed) Thanks, ass.

(The Seed cast begin to slowly walk out as we cut back over to the stage, where Marina is chatting with Setsuna now.)

MARINA: -and with the sales of my song’s single, I had enough money to rebuild Azadistan within a few months.

SETSUNA: That is very good to hear. I’m sure you’ll be able to maintain peace this time, Marina Ismail.

MARINA: (Smiles) Yes! And I’ve even gotten that nice Mr. Al Saachez to do some community service to make up for his sins too.

SETSUNA: (Warily) What?

MARINA: I just had to promise never to sing near him again and he eagerly agreed to it. Oh, look over there! He’s already gotten into his uniform!

(Setsuna looks across the stage, where Ali stands, dressed in blue overalls and holding a rake for some reason. He looks miserable. Marina shouts over to him.)

MARINA: You can start with the gardens of the palace, Groundskeeper Ali.

(Ali mutters something incoherent and walks away. Setsuna looks satisfied and turns back to Marina when suddenly…)

GRAHAM: (Off-screen) YOUNG MAN!

(Setsuna looks to see Graham standing, arms folded, a short distance away from him. Graham’s expression is stern and filled with intent. Billy hovers behind Graham, looking worried.)

BILLY: Graham, I thought you said you were beyond this now!

GRAHAM: (Closes his eyes) I’m not that easily satisfied.

SETSUNA: What do you want?

GRAHAM: (Looks at Setsuna) I’ve regained my honor as a Flag Fighter, but there is still a score to be settled with you!

SETSUNA: (Narrows eyes) You’ve learned nothing.

GRAHAM: Fate must be met head-on, young man! We shall have an honor duel right here and now! Mount your Gundam!

(We hear a voice over the external speakers of the 00-Raiser, which can be seen through the hole in the auditorium’s roof. Setsuna and Graham both look up at the sound of the voice.)

SAJI: (Over speaker) This Gundam’s occupied right now, so screw off.

LOUISE: (Over speaker) Heeheehee, Saji, you’re such an untamable maverick!

SAJI: (Over speaker) Quiet, woman!

(The speaker switches off and Graham and Setsuna turn back to each other.)

SETSUNA: I don’t quite know what they’re doing in there, but obviously I can’t fight you now.

GRAHAM: (Grits his teeth) I will not leave you alone until my thirst for glory is quenched! Fight me, boy!

SETSUNA: No.

GRAHAM: Fine, how about some air hockey? Best two out of three?

SETSUNA: (Pauses) …Okay.

GRAHAM: (Pumps fist) So it shall be! Let’s get out of here!

(Graham leaps off stage and heads for the exit, with Setsuna reluctantly following. Feldt hesitates for a moment and looks over at Sumeragi, who nods with a smile. Feldt jumps off stage to follow Setsuna. Mileina looks over at her parents.)

MILEINA: Oh, oh, can I go too, papa? Mama?

IAN: I don’t see the harm, do you, dear?

LINDA: (Smiles pleasantly) Yes, dear.

(Mileina squeals and runs to follow Feldt. Patrick also jumps off stage.)

PATRICK: (Cheerfully) They’ll need a referee! And I, the Indestructible Colasour, am perfect for the job!

SUMERAGI: You sure you shouldn’t be getting home to Kati?

PATRICK: (Waves dismissively) Oh, I’m sure I’ll get off with a couple kicks to the ribs, it’ll be fine. Seeya!

(Patrick saunters out of the auditorium. Sumeragi looks around at everyone remaining.)

SUMERAGI: So, what’ll us adults do now?

(Lyle’s still sitting in a chair, looking despondent.)

LYLE: (Mumbles) Whatever, I don’t care.

(Regene walks up beside him and slaps a hand on his shoulder.)

REGENE: Oh, buck up, laddy! Soon as we get back to Veda, I’ll pump out a new clone body for Anew. (Motions at Tieria’s corpse, which is still just sitting around limply in a chair) And for T-Sphere over there too.

(Lyle abruptly springs from his seat and grabs Regene by the collar.)

LYLE: (Disbelieving) REALLY???

REGENE: (Smiles) Sure! I’m just that kinda guy…or girl…or whatever.

(Tears build in Lyle’s eyes and he hugs Regene, who just smiles more.)

REGENE: See, I’m not sure if I should like this or not. Weird humans…

(Lyle releases Regene and looks over at Sumeragi.)

LYLE: (Wipes some tears away) That settles it then, we’re goin’ drinkin’!

SUMERAGI: Now you’re talking!

(Lasse gets Neil in a headlock.)

LASSE: First round’s on this guy! That’ll teach him to go die on us!

NEIL: (Struggling) Hey, now wait just a minute- !

ALLELUJAH: (Smiles) Marie and I kindly accept your offer, Lockon.

MARIE: (Smiles) That’s very kind of you.

SOMA: (Frowns) I’ll pay for my own, thanks.

BILLY: And I’ll just get something non-alcoholic, if you don’t mind.

(Lasse releases Neil and Lyle throws his arm around his brother’s shoulders from the other side.)

LYLE: C’mon, let’s show ‘em how the Dylandy boys drink!

NEIL: (Grins) Alright, alright! After all, I’ve still got one working eye left!

SUMERAGI: (Slaps Neil on the back) Ha! Not after tonight! Let’s do this thing!

(Everyone files out of the auditorium, except for Regene (and Tieria’s corpse, which everyone seems to have forgotten about). He lingers around on stage as everyone leaves, with a smile on his face. Once everyone is gone, Regene turns to look off-stage.)

REGENE: You can come out now.

(A hunched, shadowy figure using a cane slowly walks out on-stage. It is AEOLIA SCHENBERG!)

AEOLIA: (Smiles) Ah, everything has gone according to plan.

REGENE: (Confused) Yeah, I’m still a little foggy on that…wasn’t the plan to unite the world?

AEOLIA: Oh dear me, no. It was to get the Dylandys and Sumeragi Li Noriega into an epic drinking contest.

REGENE: Huh. I…see.

AEOLIA: (Waves hand) Nah, I’m just messin’ with ya. It was really a complex marketing scheme to build a merchandising empire based off Celestial Being. Man, it has turned out great. Action figures, trading cards, video games, now a movie…and the next step…is Celestial Being Land.

REGENE: Huh?

AEOLIA: A giant amusement park with a Celestial Being theme! And if it takes off, we’ll expand with Euro Celestial Being Land! Which probably won’t be as successful, but whaddayagonnado?

REGENE: Oh. So my whole existence was brought about to sell toys and trading cards?

AEOLIA: Correct.

REGENE: And you cryogenically froze yourself hundreds of years ago so you could reap the benefits of this merchandising empire.

AEOLIA: Again, correct.

REGENE: Hmph. (Smiles) Works for me!

AEOLIA: (Smiles) That’s the spirit, old boy/girl!

REGENE: (Grinning) Hey, after all… (Throws fist into air and shouts) ORETACHI WA GUNDAM DA!

THE END
Last edited by Thundermuffin on Tue Feb 26, 2013 12:50 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: A Typical Episode of Gundam Seed Destiny

Thundermuffin wrote:(Everyone watches as Marina clears her throat and begins to open her mouth. Suddenly, Lacus jumps up on the stage alongside her.)

LACUS: (Smirks) How cute. Now stand aside and I’ll show how this is done.

MARINA: (Smiles kindly) Oh, do you want to help? I could use a backup singer.

LACUS: (Eyes narrow) Back…up? BACKUP??? You- !
Oh, this is too good. :mrgreen:
LOUISE: This is the best! We’re winning, we’re totally beating him!

(Louise turns back to look at Saji, who has a sullen look on his face as GN particles float around in the cockpit.)

LOUISE: (Sighs and rolls her eyes) You know, the least you could do was smile, Saji!

SAJI: (Yawns) Damn, woman. Why y’always gotta be such a bear-trap on m’balls?

LOUISE: (Pauses, confused) Pardon?

SAJI: (Mockingly) “Pardon? I can hear you Saji over the sound of my stupid whiny bitch voice”.

LOUISE: S-Saji…you’ve never spoken to me in this way… (Suddenly grins) I LIKE IT.

SAJI: (Shrugs) Bitches don’t know ‘bout my backbone.
LOUISE: (Speaks up) Yeah, you’re just-

SAJI: (Interrupts) You’re ZOINKing done, snotball.

(In the 0-Raiser’s cockpit, Louise looks back at Saji with wide eyes, Saji just regards her with annoyance.)

SAJI: What?

LOUISE: (Trembling) Get your suit off. Take me right now, in this cockpit.

SAJI: (Rolls eyes) Psh. Whatever.
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