My own contribution to the Gundam multi-verse. Lord knows it took long enough.
Due to the chapter length, I won't be posting it directly on MAHQ, but you can find it at Fanfiction.net
Basic premise you ask? Well, for one thing, this is an original story as opposed to the usual remakes or AUs that are popular these days. That means aside from the usual Bandai copyrights, most of the elements come from my own imagination. Don't worry though, I'm using canon mobile suits and familiar faces will appear sooner or later.
The summary is as follows:
The year is CE 101, approximately 30 years after the First Bloody Valentine War that started it all. Due to the effects of Break the World, the destruction of LOGOS and the desolation of the Earth Alliance and ZAFT, the Earthsphere has been plunged into a chaotic and desolate state. Earth nations have long since turned their attention away from space and have now turned on each other, while more and more renegades run around the planet with weapons that were once used by militaries. Adding to this is the disappearence of certain governments and people, as well a series of mysterious events that has dropped the Earthside population down significantly from what it was during the familiar 70s. The world is far from what it once was...
Among all this, a young woman embarks on a journey with a crew of scavengers across the desolate wasteland to parts unknown. This is the story of her Odyssey.
Author's Note: Before anyone says anything, yes I know it sounds a lot like Gundam X, but I assure you it's not a direct rip off . Feel free to post reviews, opinions, death threats or prophecies of doom.
Mobile Suit Gundam SEED ODYSSEY
- wing zero alpha
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Mobile Suit Gundam SEED ODYSSEY
Last edited by wing zero alpha on Sun Apr 01, 2007 5:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.
- Folken Fanel
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I read it and left a review on Fanfiction. Its a good read, and I hope you update soon.
Mobile Suit Gundam: Neo
It's common knowledge that 99.99% of users on Youtube are ZOINKING idiots.
It's common knowledge that 99.99% of users on Youtube are ZOINKING idiots.
- wing zero alpha
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- RedShirt0909
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Seem's pretty good so far. I haven't seen X, so I can't comment on the similarities there, but I like it so far. Any idea if there will be a regular schedule for updates, or will it be updated when you get the work done at a somewhat random times?
Yea, though I sail through the Valley of the Shadow of Death, I shall fear no evil, for I am conning ten thousand tons of 'screw you'
- wing zero alpha
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Pretty much the latter. Real life is a b**** right now, so I'll be lucky to get anything up regularly.RedShirt0909 wrote:Any idea if there will be a regular schedule for updates, or will it be updated when you get the work done at a somewhat random times?
Interesting, never saw any similarities with that.wow.. it reminds me of V gundam in a way too....
Can't always be Grand Theft Gundam.at least its way better than the traditional seed "gundam jackings"
- wing zero alpha
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- Folken Fanel
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Well, after two hours of on-off reading, I have to say I really am interestd in where this thing goes. Compared to most of the other stuff on Fanfiction.net, this is quite original. Nice work.
Mobile Suit Gundam: Neo
It's common knowledge that 99.99% of users on Youtube are ZOINKING idiots.
It's common knowledge that 99.99% of users on Youtube are ZOINKING idiots.
- wing zero alpha
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Phase 04 is up.
Admittingly I ended this chapter halfway through, because it ended up going into 8000+ words and I'm trying to cut back on my chapter lengths. I'm working on Phase 05 quickly to compensate and get past this part of the story faster. But nonetheless, I don't think I did half bad on this one.
Admittingly I ended this chapter halfway through, because it ended up going into 8000+ words and I'm trying to cut back on my chapter lengths. I'm working on Phase 05 quickly to compensate and get past this part of the story faster. But nonetheless, I don't think I did half bad on this one.
- wing zero alpha
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Phase 05 is up. As usual, please read and review.
Nicely done with the latest episode. I was able to follow the battle from beginning to end. I admit I had to chuckle when Kira and Athrun were referred to with such a reverential tone as the "legends of the past".
-We will not be caught by surprise!
*Almost everyone I've killed uttered similar last words.
-Then I am glad once again that you are on my side.
*They've often said that too.
*Almost everyone I've killed uttered similar last words.
-Then I am glad once again that you are on my side.
*They've often said that too.
- wing zero alpha
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Well they were referred to as such during Destiny, and they certainly did enough to deserve it, so I figured thirty or so years from then they'd be remembered like UC people remember Amuro Ray or Char Aznable. Glad you enjoyed it all the same.Antares wrote:Nicely done with the latest episode. I was able to follow the battle from beginning to end. I admit I had to chuckle when Kira and Athrun were referred to with such a reverential tone as the "legends of the past".
- wing zero alpha
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Phase 06 is now up.
Once again I had to end a chapter early simply for getting too long, this time at +12000 words. I've written much longer in other stories, but it's still an annoying habit that I have yet to defeat. Hopefully I'll do better in the next chapter.
Once again I had to end a chapter early simply for getting too long, this time at +12000 words. I've written much longer in other stories, but it's still an annoying habit that I have yet to defeat. Hopefully I'll do better in the next chapter.
Personally I din't find it too long, and besides, given my own style of writing, I'm in the same boat.
A few comments:
It's been a while since I read up on my German, but the phrase May uses is the basic form "essen", when I think the imperative form iß would be more appropriate... I don't know if this actually is more accurate, or if you mind these details though. And I also found it funny when May quipped about Germans being taught to drink early on; is there a European country that doesn't make that claim?
Ryoko seems to be a bit of a... tough girl, I'd say. Taking a beating like that. I have to say I might've enjoyed the fight more if she'd ended up smacked, but I suppose young female protagonists have something to prove (the same applies to some extent to Emily in ShadowCell's current fic). It's not bad as such, I suppose it just belongs into the genre.
Australia sounds more and more like a total wasteland, giving your fic a bit of Gundam-X flavor, but it's all for the better IMHO. You definitely give the Break of the World the serious gravitas it deserved, which was mostly left out in GSD (Stargazer did give one ep to it, more or less). It seems also that you (and you're not the only one) like Ian Lee, and feel bad he got such a short end of the stick in the series. And finally, the way you make it connect succinctly with previous people and events of CE is as artful as always. I didn't even know that bit about the battle of Girty Lue. Maybe I ought to read the Gundamofficial again one of these days.
A few comments:
It's been a while since I read up on my German, but the phrase May uses is the basic form "essen", when I think the imperative form iß would be more appropriate... I don't know if this actually is more accurate, or if you mind these details though. And I also found it funny when May quipped about Germans being taught to drink early on; is there a European country that doesn't make that claim?
Ryoko seems to be a bit of a... tough girl, I'd say. Taking a beating like that. I have to say I might've enjoyed the fight more if she'd ended up smacked, but I suppose young female protagonists have something to prove (the same applies to some extent to Emily in ShadowCell's current fic). It's not bad as such, I suppose it just belongs into the genre.
Australia sounds more and more like a total wasteland, giving your fic a bit of Gundam-X flavor, but it's all for the better IMHO. You definitely give the Break of the World the serious gravitas it deserved, which was mostly left out in GSD (Stargazer did give one ep to it, more or less). It seems also that you (and you're not the only one) like Ian Lee, and feel bad he got such a short end of the stick in the series. And finally, the way you make it connect succinctly with previous people and events of CE is as artful as always. I didn't even know that bit about the battle of Girty Lue. Maybe I ought to read the Gundamofficial again one of these days.
-We will not be caught by surprise!
*Almost everyone I've killed uttered similar last words.
-Then I am glad once again that you are on my side.
*They've often said that too.
*Almost everyone I've killed uttered similar last words.
-Then I am glad once again that you are on my side.
*They've often said that too.
- wing zero alpha
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Forgive me on that, I only speak fairly little German myself, and have to rely on second hand translators in order to produce it (I think ShadowCell does the same thing). Same goes for my Japanese, which I'm actually a little better at. As for the drinking, I'd like to go and say that claim isn't limited to European countries; Americans as well, despite what the government tries to make it sound, take pride in that too . But yeah, May's comment was inspired more from how Germany is well reputed for its beer. Say what you will about Germans, but they make some of the best beer around.Antares wrote:It's been a while since I read up on my German, but the phrase May uses is the basic form "essen", when I think the imperative form iß would be more appropriate... I don't know if this actually is more accurate, or if you mind these details though. And I also found it funny when May quipped about Germans being taught to drink early on; is there a European country that doesn't make that claim?
There are two things you have to remember here: one, she's a coordinator and therefore already thick skinned, and two, she grew up in a very harsh environment. In order to survive or at least prevent from getting gang banged, Ryoko had to be a tough girl from the beginning, and the fact she's got a stronger physique than even those of her own kind (as Winter noted) only makes her tougher. That and one of my peeves with teenage mecha pilots is that they tend to get smacked around too easily, and it's especially bad in Gundam; to memory, the only "tough" star protagonists I can recall are Judau Ashta, Domon Kasshu, Heero Yuy, and to some degree Kira Yamato, who seems to know some martial arts judging by how he handled his confrontations Gerard Garcia and Sai. So when I make mecha pilots, they tend to be on the tough side, as their job requires it (imagine if real life fighter pilots had the willpower of Shinji Ikari and the brattiness of Kamille Viden).Ryoko seems to be a bit of a... tough girl, I'd say. Taking a beating like that. I have to say I might've enjoyed the fight more if she'd ended up smacked, but I suppose young female protagonists have something to prove (the same applies to some extent to Emily in ShadowCell's current fic). It's not bad as such, I suppose it just belongs into the genre.
Actually, I made up the Battle of Girty Lue as I noted at the end; I just wanted to give some meaning behind the ship's name, since most CE vessels tend to be named after historical figures or battles, and the Girty Lue was too good a ship to be left out of that tradition. And yes, I do like Ian Lee, since for the few moments we did see him in GSD he came across as a cool guy. I was pretty angered when he had to "die" along with the Girty Lue because Djibril tried to sneak away, probably more so than I should have been.Australia sounds more and more like a total wasteland, giving your fic a bit of Gundam-X flavor, but it's all for the better IMHO. You definitely give the Break of the World the serious gravitas it deserved, which was mostly left out in GSD (Stargazer did give one ep to it, more or less). It seems also that you (and you're not the only one) like Ian Lee, and feel bad he got such a short end of the stick in the series. And finally, the way you make it connect succinctly with previous people and events of CE is as artful as always. I didn't even know that bit about the battle of Girty Lue. Maybe I ought to read the Gundamofficial again one of these days.
Oh sure, and I didn't mean to sound like the grammar police. Just something that stuck to my eye.Forgive me on that, I only speak fairly little German myself, and have to rely on second hand translators in order to produce it (I think ShadowCell does the same thing). Same goes for my Japanese, which I'm actually a little better at.
True enough, but they do specialize in beer. Whereas us in the north, we like our liquor clear and with a high percentage of alcohol in it. The Germans (and Czech) have beer, the French have wine, the Spanish have beer and wine, I don't know what the Italians have, but then the Nordic countries and Russia are hard liquor all the way. And the funny thing is, here it changes between a cause for national pride (drinking games with other nationalities) and a national stigamata (it gives the impression that a Finn swims in a tub of vodka from the cradle to the grave).But yeah, May's comment was inspired more from how Germany is well reputed for its beer. Say what you will about Germans, but they make some of the best beer around.
Point well taken. And Brutus was drunk, so it leveled the playing field a bit.So when I make mecha pilots, they tend to be on the tough side, as their job requires it (imagine if real life fighter pilots had the willpower of Shinji Ikari and the brattiness of Kamille Viden).
Regarding Lee, usually I am against resurrecting any characters, but Lee was never given the chance to become prominent of screen or have any real potential. As such his return is not that big of a problem, but just something I've noted in other fics as well. On Girty Lue, well, d'oh. Should've properly read the end notes.
-We will not be caught by surprise!
*Almost everyone I've killed uttered similar last words.
-Then I am glad once again that you are on my side.
*They've often said that too.
*Almost everyone I've killed uttered similar last words.
-Then I am glad once again that you are on my side.
*They've often said that too.
- wing zero alpha
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Italians specialize in wine; hell, we (I'm half-Italian by heritage) literally brought it to the rest of Europe through the Roman Empire. And as for the Finnish dilemna of pride vs. stigma, lol. I might have to remember that concept for future writings.Antares wrote:True enough, but they do specialize in beer. Whereas us in the north, we like our liquor clear and with a high percentage of alcohol in it. The Germans (and Czech) have beer, the French have wine, the Spanish have beer and wine, I don't know what the Italians have, but then the Nordic countries and Russia are hard liquor all the way. And the funny thing is, here it changes between a cause for national pride (drinking games with other nationalities) and a national stigamata (it gives the impression that a Finn swims in a tub of vodka from the cradle to the grave).
Actually, I'm not big on resurrecting the dead myself, but as you said, Lee barely got fleshed out in SEED Destiny and so deserved a second chance in the limelight. Besides, as I said in my end notes, Gundam in general is practically reknowned for bringing back the otherwise dearly departed; I doubt Those Who Shall Not Be Mentioned will hold it against me for having another one "miraculously survive".Regarding Lee, usually I am against resurrecting any characters, but Lee was never given the chance to become prominent of screen or have any real potential. As such his return is not that big of a problem, but just something I've noted in other fics as well.
On a side note, others are bringing back Lee as well? Wow, he's more popular than I took him for.