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 Post Posted: Sat Apr 17, 2010 9:23 pm 
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Mecha Flunky

Joined: Sat Apr 17, 2010 9:15 pm
Posts: 3
Please look forward to my next release as well.

This is the voiced version of the story:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8W-Khdq4bc

Blog: http://CalphistanReport.blogspot.com

Twitter: http://twitter.com/MyrielDesu

Terms to know before reading:

Baka- means idiot in Japanese for those who don't know what it means.

Day 1

Myriel: Hi everyone this is my first field recording so be nice to me okay, if you like it please post some replies of how you think about it. Alright lets start.

Kyle search frantically for his idiotic Commanding officer Shinjiro Bakaidiot to wake him up for the day, since he's not in his room. Kyle finds him soundly asleep on a engineering panel in hanger two of the base.

Kyle: Captain, what the hell are you doing here? Shouldn't you be in your room sleeping instead of the freakng hanger!?

Shinjiro: Ehhhhh...ahhh...hehhh Lieutenant? Yo, hows it going?

Kyle: Eh...ah...Captain what the hell are you doin here? don't tell you me you stayed here the whole entire night working.

Shinjiro: Ah that's a good question Lieutenant, First off I was working on my atmospheric missile for the night and yes I was here the whole night working with the techies to finish it.

Kyle: ...Captain explain to me why the hell were you working on an atmospheric missile when you could have just used one of the missiles on the base?

Shinjiro: ...We had atmospheric missiles on the base?

Kyle: ...yessss, we do...

Shinjiro: ...ah crap, no worries this one is better than those anyway I'm sure of it becuase I designed it myself not some mad scientist in a lab somewhere ahahahahahahah ha yeah.

Kyle: Yayaya, you should be speaking for yourself. And why would you need an atmospheric missile anyway? Wait, captain your not planning to launch anything into the atmosphere are you?

Shinjiro: Why of course I am why wouldn't I be! Everything is Japanese I tell you Japanese!

Kyle: ...I'm guesing I should be under the assumption that you just said "just as planned" by saying "Japanese" but I could be wrong.

Shinjiro: Your absolutely right lieutenant, thats exactly what I mean when I said Japanese. I'm to lazy to say just as planned its a bit long lieutenant just a bit.

Kyle: I see, I see so what exactly are you plannig to launch into space sir?

Shinjiro: Why DOLS of course! What else?

Kyle: Heh, dolls!? you want to launch dolls into space? Why the hell do you want to launch a bunch of kids dolls into space were at war for heavens sakes captain.

Shinjiro: heh...hehhhh, what the heck are you talking about lieutenant? I'm not launching those dolls, I mean I know Shuri has a doll collection in her room but I'm not planning to deprive her of those dolls, although that is a good idea now that I think of it.

Kyle: No it's not, she'll kill you for those dolls and you know it! Just like when you took the last cake that she was going to get during lunch last week.

Shinjiro: ...ah ahhahaha yeah your right that is a bad idea. Anyhow I'm not plannig to launch the dolls that your thinking about lieutenant but my Dols or my Damn Obliterating Laser System... DOLS for short.

Kyle: hehhh, Why didn't you that before sir!!!

Shinjiro: Simple, you didn't ask.

Kyle: Ah, what the hell your totally going to get me with that everytime aren't you!?

Shinjiro: Probably, unless you start asking me for the details before hand.

Hiding behind the supply crates in hanger two is Myriel spying on both Kyle and Shinjiro.

Myriel: (sigh)haaaa... check des, baka.

Myriel: Thats it for today's report thank you for listening and reading. If you want to know more please visit my blog or follow us on twitter.


Last edited by MyrielDesu on Sat Apr 24, 2010 11:52 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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 Post Posted: Tue Apr 20, 2010 2:29 am 
Offline
Mecha Flunky

Joined: Sat Apr 17, 2010 9:15 pm
Posts: 3
Due to encryption on the command channel I can't retrieve the communication files With Haroki on it so please listen to this song while you read:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uMBrNnxp5M0

Blog: http://CalphistanReport.blogspot.com

My Twitter Account: http://twitter.com/MyrielDesu
Captain Shinjiros account: http://twitter.com/Bakatesto
Lt. Kyles Twitter account: http://twitter.com/StrategicAid

Terms to know before reading:

Gunsuo- Sergeant

Nandeska- What!?

Nani oh- What the hell

Masaka- No way

Day 2

Myriel: Hi, everyone its me again here for my second battlefield report, and this
one finally confirms what the captain has been planning for the past few days by
making us setup traps and launching his DOLS into space. Also, I did some searching
and found the captain and lieutenant Kyles twitter pages online so I'll post them
here along with mine for those of you who are curious to what were up to. Remember
to check out the blog and our Twitter pages for updates to everyday events.

Myriel: Sorry for the long intro, so without any ado lets start.

The captain is drinking tea as usual in his office as per his morning ritual.I'm
there checking some paper work to send to command for supplies.

Sgt. Mathers: Sir, reporting sir, we have multiple enemy units amassing around the
base perimeter sir.

Shinjiro: ...Gunsuo, can you not see I'm having my morning tea, what does that usually mean?

Sgt. Mathers: It means not to disturb you sir, my apologies Sir! But the enemy is
at our doorstep, Shouldn't we welcome them?

Shinjiro: Why of course we should, it's only proper to welcome them. Go get Haroki
and tell him to come dressed as an enemy scout. And stop with the sir crap its
annoying me, call me commander or captain! I mean I know your new to the base so
get used to calling me either of the two.

Sgt. Mathers: Sir, Yes...I mean yes commander.

Shinjiro: Excellent, your progressing already. Myriel please head to the command
center after your done and activate DOLS please.

Sgt. Mathers runs to get Master Sergeant Haroki.

Myriel: Yes, captain. Captain do you remember where you setup the majority of the
traps around our base?

Shinjiro: Why of course I do, it's not like I was drinking tea the whole time you
guys were setting up the traps.

Myriel: But you were...

Shinjiro: Don't worry about it, its fine.

Myriel: If you say so...

Places a hidden recorder before I leave. LT. Kyle walks in from his morning patrol
of the base.

Kyle: Sir, our troops are prepped and ready to deploy at your call.

Shinjiro: You know Lieutenant, I would really like to finish my morning tea, but
that doesn't seem possible at the moment.

Kyle: Sir, forget your freaking tea, our enemy is no laughing matter.

Shinjiro: Ehhh...Who is it this time?

Kyle: It's "The Reaper" and his forces this time.

Shinjiro: Oh Reallyyyyy...Well then lets avoid direct contact.

Haroki: Commander did you call for me?

Shinjiro: Yes I did, didn't I?

Kyle: Do you even remember that sir?

Shinjiro: Lieutenant, its early in the morning and I haven't finished my tea, so my
memory is still fuzzy.

Kyle: Fuzzy!? commander this isn't the time to have a "fuzzy" memory!

Shinjiro: Anyhow, I did call for you I'm sure of it, and yes there is a reason to
why I called you here Haroki. Gunsuo, you are to take the southern pass and scout
out what the enemy is planning, got it? Report back what you see immediately.

Haroki: Yes, commander, I'm gone.

Kyle: Wait!...ah crap that's guy is fast. Captain! do you even remember where most
of the traps are?

Shinjiro: Ehh...Why of course I do, there totally not in the southern pass!

Kyle: actually they are...

Shinjiro:...hehhhhh nandeska, really!!! I'm sure Haroki will be fine he's like a
ninja he can avoid all these traps.

Kyle: But, but you planted so many traps that its impossible to avoid them,and
besides he doesn't even know where all the traps are!!!

Shinjiro: He'll be fine all we have to do is believe in him. That reminds me
Lieutenant what traps did we set up there?

Kyle:...your not serious are you?

Shinjiro: Actually, I am.

Kyle:...Ahem,...since I have the list here with me of the traps we placed and where
we planted them for you to review, I'll just read them off in order from the ones
nearest our base to the ones near the enemy position.

Kyle: First off are the camouflaged spiked pits of doom as you so call them.

Meanwhile at the command center.

Haroki: This is Haroki reporting nothing so farrrrr... Ah what the hell, this is bad really really bad, just think happy thoughts Haroki, happy thoughts or you'll end up just like those nice shredded shades you brought with you this morning happy

thoughts. Ahhgg I'll get out of this spiked pit yet!!!

(I imagine Haroki met with the spiked traps and is trying to climb out.)

Back at the office.

Shinjiro: I'm sure hes fine he has ninja like reflexes after all.

Kyle:...If you say so sir, next up are the wired traps of various kinds including

giant spiked camouflaged trap doors for the enemy AC units, wired explosives, and

rigged improvised explosives, you know the nasty ones.

Meanwhile at the command center.

Haroki:(panting) Yeah!!! I made it baby...Ah...this isn't good, not good at all.
Yaaaaaaa, this is bad really fraking bad. Yoooh, Wahhh, Nahhah, my god, nani oh,
hehhhhh, wahhh.

(loud clamping sounds and explosions can be heard through the comm link.)

(I imagine Haroki met with the wired traps and is dodging all of them...maybe.)

Back at the office.

Shinjiro: we actually placed those traps too? I thought they were still in the
armory.

Kyle:...ha? No captain we placed those out there to I'm afraid. Next up
is...laughing gas!?

Shinjiro: Oh yeah I remember that one, that was for the enemy to laugh off their
suffering so far. A peaceful respite of sort.

Kyle: Yayaya, with the amount that we deployed, they could practically laugh to
death.

Meanwhile at the command center.

Haroki: ahahhahahaahahahahahahah...mas...mask...on.

(I imagine Haroki set off the laughing gas and is laughing pretty hard)

Back at the office.

Shinjiro: I'm sure Haroki remembered his gas mask, besides he has his ninja mask
with him he'll be fine I'm sure of it.

Kyle:...Right...anyhow the next traps on the list are reactive mines...

Meanwhile at the command center.

Haroki:(sigh)...I think that's all of them...heh beep!?...oh mommy where did I go
wrong? OK on a count of three 1 3.

(loud explosions can be heard from the comm link with surround sound.)

(I imagine Haroki finally hit the reactive mines, and he thought he was out of it
hehe. We can even see the explosions from the command tower.)

Back at the office. Loud explosions can be heard near the base.

Shinjiro: Heh...what the hell is going on?

Kyle: I think its the reactive mines going off sir.

Shinjiro: Thats impossible, those mines aren't that sensitive and besides I'm sure
its the artillery squads firing off warning shots to the enemy as per my
regulations. That reminds me call the command tower and inform all of our forces to
move to the front gate and prepare to fire on my orders.

Kyle: Yes, commander right away. Now for the next traps on the list.

Shinjiro: Heh, there's more?

Kyle: Unfortunately, yes. As if reactive mines weren't enough we also depleted the

bases stock of chain mines...

Meanwhile at the command center.

Myriel: All units are to move to the front of the base and prepare to attack the
enemy forces. Please remember to stay in formation. All artillery units please
remember to fire in consecutive barrages with each other. All snipers, I hope your
praying for the people that your killing.

Haroki: This is the captains doing isn't it!? Only the captain can think up
somkething crazy like this yahhhhhhhhhhhh.

(Consecutive explosions can be heard through the comm link also with surround
sound.)

(I think Haroki is running for his life right about now.)

Back at the office. Loud explosions can be heard fairly far from the base, smoke
clouds can be seen on all sides of the base except the front.

Shinjiro:(Sneezes) Ah, I think someone is talking about me behind my back.

Kyle: Sir, I can see smoke coming from the direction of the explosions...

Shinjiro: Of course you would, looks like the artillery boys are getting lively
already.

Kyle: If you say so...anyhow the next traps are undeniable commander, Camouflaged
auto gun traps, with increased firing rate may I add.

Shinjiro: I knew I forgot to turn on something this morning, all I have to do is
press this red button here and were good.

Kyle: Commander, you didn't just activate them did you?

Shinjiro: Why of course I did, why not!?

Meanwhile at the command center.

Haroki:(Panting heavily) This is Haroki (panting) I made it to our perimeter
defenses, thank god the auto guns aren't active. I spotted an enemy scout by the
name of Leeroy, he assumed that I was on his side so I told him to head past the
auto guns and back to the path I took, I'll remember you Leeroy.

Myriel: Hi, this is Myriel we confirmed one Leeroy dead by auto gun fire.

Back at the office.

Kyle: Now for the final trap on the list...

Shinjiro: Yes, its my Damn Obliterating Laser System, DOLS for short baby.

Kyle:...Why am I not surprised you remember that?

Shinjiro: Of course I would, I spent endless nights making that.

Meanwhile at the command center.

Haroki: Command why are there a bunch of giant sized X's on the ground?
(Explosion)...MA..Masaka!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I'm definitely taking a vacation
after this, definitelyyyyyyyy!!!

Myriel: Haroki, if you haven't realized it yet its the DOLS system the captain
launched the other day.

(Consecutive explosions and screaming can be heard on the comm link.)

Haroki:(Panting) haaa...safe!

Jubilee Alliance Soldier: You there halt! Oh wait, your one of our scouts, wow I
was beginning to think we lost all of you guys, this place is hell on Calphistan it
seems.

Haroki:(Panting) Yeah no kidding... inform the commander that way is no good the only way past all those defenses is the front of the base it seems, their forces are all spread out to defend on all sides since our force is larger.

The Reaper: Oh really, is that a fact good to know, glad you made it back son. Go
get some well deserved rest son you look like you've been through hell, and while
your at it get the medics to patch you up. I saw your plight against that laser
system, our military needs more men like you.

The Reaper: All units prepare to attack the front of the base. We'll crush them with our overwhelming power.

Myriel: That's it for today's report thank you for listening and reading. If you want
to know more please visit my blog or follow us on twitter.


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 Post Posted: Tue Apr 20, 2010 11:09 am 
Offline
Traitor Villain
User avatar

Joined: Sun Mar 05, 2006 12:59 pm
Posts: 5913
Location: California
I merged your second thread with this one. Please use one thread to post updates and new chapters instead of posting a new thread for each chapter.


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 Post Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 11:50 pm 
Offline
Mecha Flunky

Joined: Sat Apr 17, 2010 9:15 pm
Posts: 3
Blog: http://CalphistanReport.blogspot.com

My Twitter Account: http://twitter.com/MyrielDesu
Captain Shinjiros account: http://twitter.com/Bakatesto
Lt. Kyles Twitter account: http://twitter.com/StrategicAid

Day 3

Voiced version of the story:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1MR5DiecXyg

Terms to know before reading:

Baka:idiot

Ou: Super, elite, great

Myriel: Hi everyone, I'm back with another report today, this time its a recording
of the captains trip to the supply base. If you kept up with our discussions on
Twitter you would know that the captain ran out of tea a while back so he decided
to get some at the same time as the supplies for the base.I was supposed to do this
but he thinks I'm doing a patrol around the base.

Myriel: Once again sorry for the long intro, alright here we go.

At the supply base:

Shinjiro: Right, that should be all of it, I think.

Supply Officer: Alright sir please sign here, here, and here, oh and here to if you
want.

Shinjiro: Thanks for your help, Make sure you give me a good amount of tea this
time.

Myriel:The supply Officer looks at the signed papers and smiles happily.

Supply Officer: Of course sir, gladly!

A couple of hours later:

Shinjiro: Hmm... I see the supplies here, but where are the supply trucks? They
should be here along with the supplies.

Myriel: Colonel Brenson walks by and notices the captain standing by the supplies
with no supply trucks and comes to talk to the captain.

Brenson: Shinjiro, I see that your here to pick up supplies for today, Where is
your supply officer Myriel isn't she supposed to pick up the supplies for you?

Shinjiro: Ah, you see she's currently patrolling the base and I didn't want to
bother her, so I decided to come here myself and get the supplies. Besides I wanted
to get an extra order of tea for myself anyway.

Brenson: I see, those supply boy's sure are late, I'll have to lecture them to
death once again. But to be on the safe side, I'll check the records that I have
with me here to see when their coming to pick up your supplies.

Shinjiro: Thanks alot, old man.

Myriel: Colonel Brenson looks at the signed paper work he has with him.

Brenson:...Shinjiro, remember all those times I called you an idiot?

Shinjiro:...Yes, I do...

Brenson: I take all that back, I'm sorry, truly sorry for calling you an idiot, I
really am, from the bottom of my heart I apologize to you.

Shinjiro: Heh...really? You really mean it?

Brenson: Why of course I do, other wise I wouldn't be telling you right now. I was
wrong, your not an idiot, no your ahead of all those idiots out there, your a
super, elite, the greatest among great, the best of the best idiot in the world. A
true Baka Ou among them all.

Shinjiro: Hehhhhhh...Nandeska!?

Brenson: You stinking idiot you signed the release papers saying that you had a
supply crew ready to transport all the supplies back to your base.

Shinjiro: Heh, I did?

Brenson: Yes, you did, it's signed by you right here.

Shinjiro: ...Hey your right, it is.

Brension: Shinjiro learn to read the fine print above the signature, before signing
anything.

Thats it for todays report thank you for listening and reading please come back
again for the next report.


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